I’d make it so that liquid soap dispensers sounded like they were struggling to nut quietly each time you pressed down.
I quite like the (I think?) Jewish curse: “may your laundry never dry”. That would suck wearing clothes that are always slightly damp.
That’s terrible, haha.
Every set of stairs has one step that is slightly taller than the rest
Don’t bother with steps that are each different — making steps the wrong height/length is enough. If you ever walked up/down stairs that felt really weird it’s probably because the builder ignored the international standards on that topic and built steps that are a couple centimeters off.
That was actually a thing in castle design. There’d be one step just high enough compared to the others that an assassin chasing the king would hopefully stumble on it, and the king could turn around and stab the assassin.
I’m sure you mean all the heights are a little different, but I’m envisioning where every step has to be taller than the previous one and the shenanery that would happen to make long stair cases navigable. Start with teeny tiny steps to end with uncomfortably large ones.
You monster.
You lose the ability to differentiate between a fart and a poo.
Crohns and colitis say hi
Bell ringing sound every time you get an erection
That could be deafening in certain public spaces.
This one’s my favorite
Jimmy Valner
wind makes everyone ticklish
That tornado sure sounds fun…
The good thing I can say is that Bob died laughing.
The bad thing is that if he hadn’t been laughing so much he might not have been standing there laughing when the wind threw a telephone pole at him.
No matter how hard one squeezes, there’s ALWAYS three or four drops of pee leftover, poised to strike after one finishes their business.
IT WAS YOU!
^This person right here officer.
All doors you try to open actually open the opposite direction
What’s new here?
Pocket doors would be a euclidean nightmare
USB-C now has the same connector directionality problem that USB-A does
Id like to think it would still work both ways mechanically, but would be one sided electrically.
That’s way worse.
Eyelids become translucent. In other words, you can still see anything and everything when your eyes are closed.
You own a lot of stock in eyemasks?
I own The Eyemask Emporium.
I liked their eye masks so much, I bought the place
This would be awesome! No need for underwater goggles anymore! I could shut my eyes against strong winds and still see!
You must greet everyone you meet with a handshake and ten seconds of uninterrupted eye contact. Forced smiles and a serious talk about how you really are doing are also mandatory.
Pretty awkward if you ask me :)Neurodivergent hell.
Everyone is ever so slightly telepathic, functionally making a web of felt emotions with no thoughts connecting them so what you feel from this is basically a summary of the people in the area around you.
Example: Everyone could be focused at work, nothing major going on, until someone thinks about their significant other and all of a sudden there’s a tiny bit of horny thrown in the mix, everyone knows its there, and no one knows who put it there.
Women are already scarce in IT.
You never hear someone the first couple times they try to pay you a compliment
Mirror every object. You don’t realize how many things are designed with a right-handed assumption unless you aren’t right handed. Also, most people can’t read well anymore because it’s all backwards
I’d say reading is back to normal after 2-3 days tops for most people.
Sneezing is excessively messy.
Any time you use something powered by a fossil fuel your pinkies ache about as much as a lightly stubbed toe.
This would really light a fire under corporation’s asses to adapt for climate change…
