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@ickplant@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world • 30 days ago

Stuck

lemmy.world

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Stuck

lemmy.world

@ickplant@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world • 30 days ago
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  • @tourist@lemmy.world
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    143•30 days ago

    They didn’t have any abbreviations ready for that sentence

    • Theo
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      52•
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      30 days ago

      “So, what code do we put in for the insurance company?”

      • @Gork@lemm.ee
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        22•30 days ago

        42069

      • @expatriado@lemmy.world
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        6•30 days ago

        4011

        • Theo
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          2•29 days ago

          Is 4011 something real? Or am I missing something?

      • @MsPenguinette@lemmy.world
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        4•30 days ago

        00003

    • @BarrelAgedBoredom@lemm.ee
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      30•29 days ago

      If the chief complaint is funny/fucked up enough, we won’t abbreviate it

    • @Agent641@lemmy.world
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      16•29 days ago

      FGT SPNR STK ON PNS

  • BarqsHasBite
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    43•30 days ago

    9‽

    • Tar_Alcaran
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      33•29 days ago

      I don’t have a penis, but I for one was a total idiot at age 9.

      • AbsentBird
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        14•29 days ago

        Not having a penis: the perfect counter to the fidgit spinner trap

    • @UltraMasculine@sopuli.xyz
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      30•30 days ago

      I’m much older than 9 and stuff gets stuck on my penis all the time.

    • @BakerBagel@midwest.social
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      25•29 days ago

      Boys start playing with their weiners as soon as their hands can start grasping stuff. It’s instinctual.

      • @iheartneopets@lemm.ee
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        4•29 days ago

        It’s instinctual in that all babies explore their genitals as soon as they can start willfully moving their hands, yes. It’s not just boys having a special connection to their genitalia.

        • @Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de
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          0•18 hours ago

          tbf a dick is way more fun to literally play with, like they’re so inherently comedic that all cultures agree that drawing a dick is funny

          • @iheartneopets@lemm.ee
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            0•11 hours ago

            If you don’t think the same of a vulva, then you’re only outing yourself as having incredibly little imagination/experience with them. CIA couldn’t have gotten that out of me, honestly.

    • @tomi000@lemmy.world
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      25•29 days ago

      I dont think 15yo penises fit into fidget spinners, but Im not an expert on child genitalia.

      • @ZeffSyde@lemmy.world
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        54•29 days ago

        I’ll ask my priest.

    • @Dozzi92@lemmy.world
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      29 days ago

      My wife texted me the other day:

      You know that yellow slide our son carries around? Well, he started sticking his penis in it, you have to talk to him now.

      He’s 4. It’s just what boys do.

      • @iheartneopets@lemm.ee
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        3•29 days ago

        Not just boys. Girls explore and test boundaries with their genitals too.

        • @Dozzi92@lemmy.world
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          4•29 days ago

          Have a daughter also, so I know it all too well! Our focus is “It’s normal but private.” We will see how that goes.

          • @iheartneopets@lemm.ee
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            28 days ago

            That’s gonna be our approach, too with our kiddo.

            It’s a hard one to fight your own overly-conservative programming in order to teach a healthier outlook to your kids. Hard to know if you’re going too far one way or the other. So much of parenting you just don’t know if you’re doing it right until you’re done.

            Fist-bump from one internet parent to another, you’re doing a great job ✌️

        • @andros_rex@lemmy.world
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          2•29 days ago

          Electric toothbrushes….

          • @iheartneopets@lemm.ee
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            2•29 days ago

            Never used one of those, but showerheads and bath faucets certainly

    • @MidsizedSedan@lemmy.world
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      2•28 days ago

      I wonder how my life would have changed if i had access to the internet at age 9

    • @funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works
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      2•28 days ago

      I was jerking off around that age, hadn’t ever seen any porn or anything, no need to call child protection, it was just natural for me

  • @expatriado@lemmy.world
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    27•30 days ago

    15 mins at the swimming pool is cheaper than ER

    • @assassinatedbyCIA@lemmy.world
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      1•29 days ago

      He might need to have his penis drained to get it out.

      • Fuck spez
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        1•26 days ago

        Usually I get mine out before I drain it.

  • toofpic
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    16•29 days ago

    The ultimate Helicopter Dick.

  • @SassyRamen@lemmy.world
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    16•
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    29 days ago

    Right foot penis, abdomen penis, back penis, fidgit spinner… still spinning!

  • @PapstJL4U@lemmy.world
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    14•
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    29 days ago

    That’s why you explain what the helicopter really is…

  • @hOrni@lemmy.world
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    8•29 days ago

    Like it didn’t happen to everybody at some point.

  • @HappySkullsplitter@lemmy.world
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    8•30 days ago

    Directions unclear

  • @dechnically@sh.itjust.works
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    8•29 days ago

    he’s literally me

  • @peoplebeproblems@midwest.social
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    8•29 days ago

    I’ve seen some different sizes of fidget spinners, but no way is anyone that small lol

    • Carl
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      4•29 days ago

      https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/zdv5gv/how_would_you_get_a_small_cylinder_51in_length/

  • @TootSweet@lemmy.world
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    7•29 days ago

    Fwizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

  • @KingBoo@lemmy.world
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    4•29 days ago

    … But how?

  • @ImmersiveMatthew@sh.itjust.works
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    3•29 days ago

    Someone did not know that alcohol makes you soft.

    • @assassinatedbyCIA@lemmy.world
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      29 days ago

      Yeah. Lets get the 9yo drunk

      • @AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world
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        3•29 days ago

        It builds character, dammit!

        • @WoodScientist@sh.itjust.works
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          1•28 days ago

          I mean, there’s always small beer.

      • @ImmersiveMatthew@sh.itjust.works
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        1•28 days ago

        Ahahaha. Missed that detail, but it could be 19, 29, 39, 49, 59, 69…well maybe not 69+.

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