Go back to OLD old Olympics. Everyone naked
The cheating countries now begin selecting competitors with the largest genitals for greatest lift effect.
That is just how the olympics and pro sports works.
95% training 5% finding the mutants. The 5% is basically the only way to break records these days when people aren’t trying to engineer victory.
This is why we should have events targetted at everyday tasks: “endurance sitting” “quickest 1000 stair steps carrying a heavy box” etc
Especially the judges and spectators
Would make the Winter Olympics quite challenging!
Olimpics
Ok but what if a guy just has a massive hog, should he get into this sport early?
Apparently some countries are now testing boys in puberty with a method of determining just how large their penis will become. They then train those with the largest hog potential on how to ski jump
“Hog potential” should go on the report card, next to attendance and teacher’s comments.
Your child failed the Hog Potential portion of the exam.
“But she doesn’t have a hog…”
That’s why she failed, sir.
To be fair and equal should the same be done with girls and use the term “rack size potential”
You can read a real news article here about this. Imagine injecting stuff into your penis. https://www.theguardian.com/sport/2026/feb/06/penisgate-winter-olympics-ski-jumpers-acid-penis-health-risks-explainer
I’d be ok with this if it was guaranteed their penises became infected and required amputation
Can only do it once so make it count
The ol’ Elon, as it’s traditionally called.
Just enforce a pp size of exactly 2cm, the staff will check you just before the jump & either cut or fluff you to specification.
… but while on subject - since they use (size regulated) skis as part of the equipment, why don’t they allow for like (size regulated) beaver tail buttplugs that the athletes would manoeuvre to their advantage (gliding & prolonging the jump, tho the best amongst them would actually flap it vigorously for extra lift).
In some cases of hernia, the patient experiences enlargement of testicles. Will they benefit in this sport?
research shows that the only advantage is with length and girth of the penis shaft. Testicles do not play a significant part
Remember the good old days when guys would shove socks into their underwear and girls would shove them into their bras?
I think you mean the good old days when there was a bespoke piece of clothing specifically for that purpose: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Codpiece
I love how the codpiece is not the weird part of this painting
