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How every Neo-Nazi should be handled.
That kid that kept the gold tooth on a necklace was me.
I’m pretty sure that person was Albert Einstein!
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I love this.
😮
I almost ran over a moose with a ship
I know someone who did. The police did NOT believe them. But eventually they where convinced to show up at the road close to the lake, as they didn’t actually have a code for “hitting wild life with boat”.
I woke up one morning and found a skinned moose in my yard.
RFK Jr. dumped it there
OMG!
And thus the cycle has been completed
Much better than waking up naked next to it. Not that I’d know what that’s like. Nope.
I was the victim of a drive-by ketchupping.
I had someone do a driveby breadding.
Walking down the street and some wanker throws a loaf of bread at me from his car as he drive past. The whole loaf, plastic bag an all.
Went to an orgy and didn’t have sex with anyone, on purpose. I did, however, play naked baby oil handcuff twister. Which was hilarious and painful.
The internet never fails to make me feel vanilla AF.
I always like to play “Whorer Hoedown” on Halloween.
it’s a game where I watch the adults walking down my street on Halloween and see if I can guess which ones are going to the swinger orgies before they get there.
I’m pretty good tbh.
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I’ve had 7 car-deer collisions.
Deer hate you and are trying to kill you.
Deer are just rats with plenty of room to grow.
Santa?
I believe that. Around here everybody’s hit at least one.
I once exploded one. I was going pretty fast down a hill and the poor bastard stepped right out in front of my 1984 Grand Marquis.
When I say exploded, I mean EXPLODED. I had to hit the windshield wipers because all I could see was blood and grass.
He only knocked a chunk out of my plastic grill, and I only saw a few chunks of him at the location of impact.
I saw a guy dressed as a moose carrying another guy who looked stoned get almost run over by a ship.
Dropping acid at the furry convention…
I got a moose one hunting season and decided to butcher it myself. Finished skinning the thing (took hours) and it just disappeared, no clue where it ended up.
RFK Jr’s car.
Omg I like how everyone is just doing collaborative fiction writing on here, like SCP: Lemmy Edition or something.
Lol wtf? The skin walker totally fucking played you, bro.
Wait, you skinned it for hours but it wasn’t dead, and just walked off? Or it was dead and some animal took it while you weren’t looking?
When I was 10, I went on a trip to Venezuela. At this restaurant in Caracas, I went into the bathroom. It was a single person bathroom. For some reason the door had slide locks on both sides. While I was in there, some kid locked the door from the outside (I could see through a narrow gap). It was a real door, not a stall door. I couldn’t unlock it. I started panicking a little and kicking the door. Eventually a waiter let me out.
I’m still confused about why that door could be locked on the outside.
I heard about a Chinese Tourist couple going to somewhete in Southeast Asia (I think I was like Cambodia or Thailand, can’t quite remember), and in a restaurant the woman went to the bathroom while the husband (or boyfriend? forgot the details) waited, then a long time came by and he went to check and she wasn’t there, and there was another door in the bathroom, like a door within the bathroom that leads to a backdoor out of the restaurant or something, basically, someone entered through the other door (which doesn’t go through the main restaurant) and just kidnapped her. Local law enforcement couldn’t find her, and their embassy couldn’t do much.
She was found at a circus in I think the same country like 2 or 3 year later, very close to the restaurant they were at, and she no longer recognizes her husband, or any relatives for that matter, like she got brainwashed / memory lost or something.
That story was creepy as hell, no idea if it was true or some heresay shit. But I’m not surprised, tourists get kidnapped all the time.
Edit: Also, because of this story, my mom got afraid of certain bathrooms lol. Like we went to some national/state park in the US, and there are public bathrooms, and my mom (she told me the aforementioned story btw) saw some other door inside the bathroom (I think its for maintaince workers where they store cleaning tools something) and she got scared and was deciding if we should go somewhere else for bathroom, but ultimate decided to just use the bathroom and left the door unlocked while my dad waited outside. Nothing happened. But while we were leaving, some dude walked by and she got scared lol.
That sounds like a racist story made up to stoke fear.
I like your story, but what part of it nobody believe ?
I’m not sure who believes and who doesn’t, but I’ve been in more than 30 car collisions. I’m not sure exactly how many because I’ve lost track.
One was an offset head-on collision. I think the other driver fell asleep. He claimed I came into his lane and hit him, but the impact shattered the windshield washer fluid in my car, and destroyed the front-right tire. The impact left a puddle of fluid in the middle of my lane, and the rim of the front right wheel left grooves in the street leading from where my car stopped back to the point of impact.
I was sideswiped three times. All three were hit and runs. One of them was caught on my dash cam and I got my deductible back. The other two got away.
All the rest were rear-end collisions. It happened so many times that I started to think I must be doing something wrong, but I couldn’t figure out what. Around that time I happened to look in the rear view mirror just before the impact to see the driver looking down at something on the passenger seat beside him.
Since then, I’ve understandably become very aware of what the drivers behind me are doing.
The last two times:
In late 2021 I was approaching an intersection and had a green light, but on the other side of the intersection was a school bus letting out kids. I stopped, and the jeep behind me hit me at full speed. My truck was totaled. I was knocked very briefly unconscious, but I was able to control the truck as I was pushed through the intersection and stopped.
Ironically, I had been thinking about trading in my truck for a new model. That day, on the drive home before the collision, I decided I wanted to keep it.
At the time, getting a replacement took months. I was getting to and from work driving the Civic that we bought for the kids to use. Two months after the truck was totaled I was in slow, stop-and-go traffic. Every time I had to stop, the car behind me would pull all the way up to within inches of my bumper. I wanted to scream at him. Of course, the person behind him hit him, and pushed him into me.
Luckily, that time it was slow, low speed impact. Easy damage to fix.
For the love of all that’s holy, follow at a safe distance! Three seconds minimum between you and the car in front of you. And when you stop, stop far enough back to see where the tires on the car in front of you touch the street.
If you want to slipstream (aka, drafting), become a race car driver.
Whenever you see a driver following too closely or driving erratically try to get away from them, change lanes, let them pass, whatever. Also try not to drive next to other cars. Stagger positions so if they have to serve into your lane they won’t hit you. Last tip is don’t drive in people’s blind spot when they are in the next lane. Pull ahead of them or let them get in front of you
I learned in New Jersey: driver following too close? Foot off the gas. You do not put it back on until they have angrily passed you and sped off into the night.
30? Insurance must be a nightmare
I haven’t had my rates increase noticeably for any of the accidents.
Well, not 30 for me, but I’ve been rear ended driving ~5 times. Not even sudden stop issues or anything, like, literally sitting at a stop light and the next person just doesn’t stop and hits me.
One time was waiting for a train and a dude in a huge SUV slammed into me. They tried to offer me $200 cash to not report it to insurance, I said fuck off. Ended up being like a $12,000 repair and they literally said, “fuck you” on the phone to me with the insurance agents on the line.
Was buying Pokemon cards 14 or so years ago. Was trying to buy a specific booster pack, but for some resaon I felt “dissociated” while my hand grabbed a totally different pack. I was so confused as to why I didn’t pick the booster I initially wanted… When I opened the pack outside the shop, I was surprised to see there was actually a super rare Lvl X holo card inside…
When I was around 6-7 years old (I am now 68) I was given money to get something at the store by my parents. All I remember is I no longer had the money when I got home . I did not spend the money. Have no idea what happened. Was razzed about it for years. They said I spent it on candy.
Must’ve been the wind
Had a similar thing happen to me, but I believe my dumb ass just lost it
6-7 years old
🤭
Dammit.
Back in my day we had to make do with only shfifty five!
i saw a boat almost hit a guy riding a moose
How was a boat riding a moose? Hue hue
I once got assaulted by three guys. I got pushed on the ground by surprise and instinct kicked in and I fought back. Kicked one guy in the ground so hard he had to get surgery and got one testicle removed, broke the other guy’s nose and the last one had a fractured skull.
They pushed assault charges on me and I got cleared because because they found CCTV footage of me going full Chuck Norris on these guys. The footage showed them teaming on me for no reason and I discovered one of them pulled out a knife.
I have a brown belt in classic jiu jitsu but it was the few months of Krav Maga that saved me.
Reminds me of the first scene in Travelers
spoiler
Time traveler’s consciousness transferrered into someone that historically got beaten to death, and the time traveller knew combat and beat up all the assailants.
Honestly its a must-watch.
I was so mad when it got canceled.
Immediate karma lol
I don’t understand why nobody believes you! That’s very intense.
Serious trigger warning
spoiler
My mother raped me, raped my brother, and tried to force me to rape him. Multiple times.
Idk if this is OK to say. But I’m sorry that happened to you. And you and your brother deserve to be happy
What the fuck?!?
I need some eyebleach
My parents were/are abusive too, but like holy hell, SA is just a whole another level of crossing the line. Moral event horizon, absolutely zero redemption possible.
Sorry to hear that.
Please tell me she’s behind bars!?
That’s fucking awful.
Not that it helps a damn thing but you have my condolences for whatever that’s worth. Hope you’re doing alright.
