“Game” doesn’t exist. Clean yourself, be respectful of others, talk to people. That’s the entire game.
You just lost the game btw, but that’s to another point
My ‘game’ issue is I kind of break down when I speak to a girl I am interested in.
I get so nervous and overthink that I stop functioning. I run out of things to say and the conversation just doesn’t flow.
I put way too much pressure on myself and it is extremely difficult to break out of it.
But if I speak to girls I am not interested in, then I am more myself. No pressure, not trying hard.
My friend was like that. He had a lot of friends who were girls, and the way that he handled that was by putting us all in the “friend” box (he was bi, so he did the same for guys, but given that most guys are straight, that wasn’t as necessary). It was a great method until he ended up hooking up with his best friend — it was a surprise to no-one but him. He walked around looking shellshocked for a week.
This is the best strat. Forget the sex/relationship, be friends. Everyone has an easier time being themselves when making friends. Being yourself is authentic and generally attractive, that’s why your friends stick around. Then if you still think they’re cool, be flirty friends, transition quick though, so you don’t give the impression you’re not interested. Then if that works out you’re already 80% of the way there, you’re socializing and flirting and not being awkward.
If you don’t have friends, make friends first. Even if you somehow manage to find a partner when you have no friends, you’ll destroy the relationship because you’ll expect the partner to provide 100% of your socializing and interpersonal needs, which isn’t really plausible.
Most people wait to speak. A good listener is someone that asks the right question and therefore is assumed to be tuned into the conversation. Ask the right questions, get them talking and you become both a good listener and the strong silent type. There’s no reason or reward for you driving the conversation.
This is what I do. I did it with my wife. I asked some questions and then just listened. She basically told me her entire life story. I interjected with supportive comments from time to time, and listened. Then we got married
Unfortunately this sounds like I was trying to manipulate my wife or whatever. Nothing could be further from the truth. I admire her tremendously and she has helped me a great deal. She’s amazing. It’s worth listening to people, that’s all I was trying to say
tl;dw - Tommy Boy is trying to sell auto parts to save his family’s business. He gets all stressed out in sales meetings but is able to talk a surly waitress into getting him some chicken wings because the chicken wings don’t matter.
So the next time you’re talking to a cute lady just remember: Chicken wings.
How can you know you’re not interested without having a conversation? Try shifting your focus to having a pleasant conversation, even if that leads to nothing. Not that that is easy all the time but if you’re chatting on a dating app or something it should be doable since it’s not exactly real time. If it’s in real life just own up to it by saying you’re nervous.
I get so nervous and overthink that I stop functioning
Otherwise known as being a human. Some people more socially anxious than others, but having social interactions helps a lot. Just don’t try to have social interactions for a goal, so to speak. Talk to people about stuff you all interested in, and you will be surprised how quickly the awkwardness melts.
Yes there is. I knew a guy who was mostly an asshole, didn’t look after himself, but could always pull hotties. Relationships didn’t last though, so there’s some balance in the world.
The way I see it some people are the type to fall in love head over heels and it gives them the gutso to tell the loved ones how they feel , which can work by the way (everybody enjoys feeling that kind of love).
The drawback is often that the type of people that burn that bright runs out of fuel quite soon.
I’m not saying one is better than the other just different strokes for different folks.
Oh believe me, there was no love involved in his one night stands. Which is fine, I’m sure both parties just wanted some fun. I was just amazed at how natural at charming girls he was, despite his idiosyncrasies.
Game exists, its a skill though and you can learn it by trying. Just requires the courage to try, fail, and try again. That said its really just charisma, and you can learn it by learning to non-flirtatiously chat people up.
I have zero game and no clue when it comes to signals.
I need this kind of woman, one that will be forward me.
“Game” doesn’t exist. Clean yourself, be respectful of others, talk to people. That’s the entire game.
You just lost the game btw, but that’s to another point
Fucker
Oh fuck you too. I didn’t finish reading the comment and wouldn’t have lost if it wasn’t for your comment
My ‘game’ issue is I kind of break down when I speak to a girl I am interested in.
I get so nervous and overthink that I stop functioning. I run out of things to say and the conversation just doesn’t flow. I put way too much pressure on myself and it is extremely difficult to break out of it.
But if I speak to girls I am not interested in, then I am more myself. No pressure, not trying hard.
Hormone driven anxiety. You don’t actually like those women. You haven’t spoken to them so you don’t know if you like them. You horny them.
Jerk off before you leave the house. It’ll help.
My friend was like that. He had a lot of friends who were girls, and the way that he handled that was by putting us all in the “friend” box (he was bi, so he did the same for guys, but given that most guys are straight, that wasn’t as necessary). It was a great method until he ended up hooking up with his best friend — it was a surprise to no-one but him. He walked around looking shellshocked for a week.
This is the best strat. Forget the sex/relationship, be friends. Everyone has an easier time being themselves when making friends. Being yourself is authentic and generally attractive, that’s why your friends stick around. Then if you still think they’re cool, be flirty friends, transition quick though, so you don’t give the impression you’re not interested. Then if that works out you’re already 80% of the way there, you’re socializing and flirting and not being awkward.
If you don’t have friends, make friends first. Even if you somehow manage to find a partner when you have no friends, you’ll destroy the relationship because you’ll expect the partner to provide 100% of your socializing and interpersonal needs, which isn’t really plausible.
Most people wait to speak. A good listener is someone that asks the right question and therefore is assumed to be tuned into the conversation. Ask the right questions, get them talking and you become both a good listener and the strong silent type. There’s no reason or reward for you driving the conversation.
This is what I do. I did it with my wife. I asked some questions and then just listened. She basically told me her entire life story. I interjected with supportive comments from time to time, and listened. Then we got married
Unfortunately this sounds like I was trying to manipulate my wife or whatever. Nothing could be further from the truth. I admire her tremendously and she has helped me a great deal. She’s amazing. It’s worth listening to people, that’s all I was trying to say
This reminds me of this scene from Tommy Boy
tl;dw - Tommy Boy is trying to sell auto parts to save his family’s business. He gets all stressed out in sales meetings but is able to talk a surly waitress into getting him some chicken wings because the chicken wings don’t matter.
So the next time you’re talking to a cute lady just remember: Chicken wings.
How can you know you’re not interested without having a conversation? Try shifting your focus to having a pleasant conversation, even if that leads to nothing. Not that that is easy all the time but if you’re chatting on a dating app or something it should be doable since it’s not exactly real time. If it’s in real life just own up to it by saying you’re nervous.
Otherwise known as being a human. Some people more socially anxious than others, but having social interactions helps a lot. Just don’t try to have social interactions for a goal, so to speak. Talk to people about stuff you all interested in, and you will be surprised how quickly the awkwardness melts.
Yes there is. I knew a guy who was mostly an asshole, didn’t look after himself, but could always pull hotties. Relationships didn’t last though, so there’s some balance in the world.
The way I see it some people are the type to fall in love head over heels and it gives them the gutso to tell the loved ones how they feel , which can work by the way (everybody enjoys feeling that kind of love). The drawback is often that the type of people that burn that bright runs out of fuel quite soon.
I’m not saying one is better than the other just different strokes for different folks.
Oh believe me, there was no love involved in his one night stands. Which is fine, I’m sure both parties just wanted some fun. I was just amazed at how natural at charming girls he was, despite his idiosyncrasies.
Game exists, its a skill though and you can learn it by trying. Just requires the courage to try, fail, and try again. That said its really just charisma, and you can learn it by learning to non-flirtatiously chat people up.
Bruh I literally haven’t lost the game in years.
FUCK