What as a English man should I look out for on a trip to the USA.
USA is really quite safe, just remember to not be black or a woman
Oh and wear a ballistics vest if you’re going anywhere near a school
Also not arabic or queer. Also dont cross streets without a green light or you might get vaporized by an orbital drone for the royal offense of “jaywalking”
And don’t try to stand in some place idly outside for more than a minute. They call that “loitering” and it’s the barbaric act of experiencing being alive in public without spending a dime.
When does the freedom kick in?
When you swipe your credit card and leave a generous tip, of course!
I think Italian and Irish are now acceptable. Maybe choose one of those.
Don’t try to bring food. I’ve seen people stopped for smuggling meat. You’re probably okay with packaged sweets or chocolate, but you should declare it.
Don’t be fooled into thinking you can get tea if you see it offered. It may be some strange flavour, or very weak, or iced, or all three. And it will be hard to explain that you want milk and sugar with it.
Biscuits are good enough, but chocolate is rough.
And, of course, a “biscuit” will mean a type of savory scone.
If your shop, at most stores they will pack shopping bags for you and are a little shocked and overly grateful if you do it yourself.
Be prepared to tip in many circumstances (but not, oddly enough, for having your groceries packed).
Be prepared to be asked about football, the Beatles, the Queen, maybe even the King.
Don’t be offended is someone attempts to do a British accent at you, it’s meant as a friendly greeting.
If driving:
Four-way stops are like roundabouts without the roundabout. But with stop signs.
Pedestrians are not expected to look out for traffic, but are not allowed to just cross anywhere. So it balances out.
Someone has stolen the clutch pedals from all the cars.
The last one got me. A friend of mine from the US asked if my partner could drive a manual. I was confused at first, “can’t everyone?”
On the reality show The Amazing Race, it’s never the rock climbing or skiing or skydiving that holds back the teams. It’s driving the manual rental car from the airport.
I drive manual in the UK but have never tried a left-hand-drive manual car, I’d probably keep hitting the door with my left hand.
I did that all the time driving a manual in Japan and England the other way around. 🤣
Quick note on this one
Pedestrians are not expected to look out for traffic, but are not allowed to just cross anywhere. So it balances out.
If you end up driving, pedestrians are not allowed to cross anywhere (although some places like New York have legalized crossing anywhere) but pedestrians always have the right of way. You can’t run people over because they crossed outside a crosswalk.
So if on foot, use crosswalks or you could get a ticket for jaywalking. If in a vehicle, don’t hit pedestrians.
You can’t run people over because they crossed outside a crosswalk.
But you can shoot them, right?
You can’t run people over because they crossed outside a crosswalk.
Unless they are black and poor and you drive a big truck in a southern city at night. Then, it’s just another unfortunate accident.
So glad I’m not driving
Well, I hope this thread has also put you off being a pedestrian.
Can’t tell if you realize this is a shitpost
I noticed! That’s why my reply became a semi-crazed random stream of consciousness.
Bring a printed copy of your ESTA / visa for immigration. Get some kind of travel insurance that covers health emergencies, and have proof of that printed as well.
This could vary depending on the situation, but as someone who works in healthcare in the US (pray for me), it doesn’t really matter if you’ve got proof of traveler’s insurance, unless I’m able to bill them directly and get a paid claim for it. In every case I’ve dealt with traveler’s insurance (admittedly not a ton, but these things are usually handled similarly across the industry), I’ve been instructed by the insuring company to bill the patient/ client, and that the client will be submitting a claim.
If it’s something relatively inexpensive like medication, you’ll probably be charged at the pharmacy, pay out of pocket and get reimbursed.
If, God forbid, you need to stay at a hospital, or dare to mention the word “ambulance”, you’ll be given a bill for $1 million, which you’ll forward to the insurance company. They’ll handle paying the hospital, then follow up with you on any kind of copay you’re meant to be left with.
Where in the USA are you going. Saying you’re going to the USA is like saying you’re going to europe. There’s a vast difference between the different states and regions within those states.
[State removed] mate just a short stay
My condolence, I’m not joking.
My condolences.
Mostly joking, I dont know a damn thing about Arizona. There should be some beautiful national parks there but other than that it’s pretty empty. Vastly different landscape than the UK though so that should be interesting. Also you’re definitely visiting durring the right time of year.
I lived in Tucson for a while. Very good food scene.
Weather is actually pretty nice this time of year.
Nothing really special to be aware of. Stay away from cholla cactus. Lol
It’s a single country with a single currency, a single government, a single history, and a single language. Yes there’s a lot of variance within the country, but it’s really nothing compared to visiting Europe.
Single currency, true, nothing else you wrote was
Single language made me lol.
Sure, most signs have English on them… but that’s it.
I think they meant where, as in are they visiting mountains, desert, rainforest, plains, or certain city or state. There’s a huge range of cultures across the very different regions in the country.
I honestly love it when such profoundly misinformed statements are put forward with absolute authority like this.
a single history
You know that half the country went to war with the other half, right?
a single government
In California, you can order weed through an app and get it delivered to your front door. In Idaho, get pulled over after picking up for the month, you’re a felon.
a single language
Single official language sure. At my work I’m the only native English speaker and a majority of our customers are foreigners who speak little English.
They’re driving on the right side.
Good reminder, he should teach them how to drive on the left. Lead by example.
There really is no such thing as ‘The USA.’
I live in New York City and what’s cool here will get you arrested in other places.
Some towns are fine with you having a rifle on open display. Some towns are fine with you smoking pot on the street.
I recommend travel health insurance. It’s affordable and a good piece of mind considering their healthcare can be extremely expensive.
Eh, if it’s a hospital you just don’t pay the bill. If it’s an urgent care it’s pretty cheap.
Don’t forget your gun. America is extremely dangerous but only if you’re unarmed. All the criminals and cops can smell if you have a gun and they’ll be too afraid to do anything to you if you have one.
Also you can’t trust our water, so it’s purely Soda and Budweiser while you’re here. Locals might tell you to eat at local restaurants but their stomachs are habituated. You’ll need to stick to McDonald’s. Luckily there is one on every single corner.
If you get injured you should avoid using an ambulance as they will take you directly to a hospital. In the US that’s just where we go to die. You need to drive yourself to an Urgent Care doctor. If you can’t drive yourself and have to use an ambulance then there is a complimentary memorial wreath that can be sent to your family. Along with the invoice for your death care of course.
The US is smaller than it appears on maps. This is because most maps are not American centric and have to expand the US to show the ratio properly. You might have budgeted multiple days to travel between the coasts but you really can just do New York one day and the Grand Canyon the next day.
Did I miss anything? Oh yeah it’s traditional to make a bomb joke with the customs agent as you come into the country. Especially if you can manage a middle eastern accent. All of us do it. It’s a grand joke.
Did I miss anything?
Cops are usually chill and laid back, but they get tired of the monotony of their job sometimes and appreciate the use of erratic, unpredictable movement when interacting with them. They also like someone who is proactive, so instead of waiting for them to ask you for your licence and registration, just jump right out of your car as soon as they step out of theirs and pull your wallet out of your pocket as quickly as you can for them. You’ll never have an issue with the cops again after this.
🤣🤣🤣
My condolences
Never take the ambulance. They will suck your money and your soul.
Don’t take your real phone with you. Just get a cheap burner phone that you can reset after customs went through it.
Bring your own marmite.
You can buy marmite in many stores in my area (LA).
Customs maybe be unhappy at bringing in food.
What is it with the US and marmite if you all like it so much import it
Tarrifs :(
Good luck not getting shot mate.
I’ll try my best
Just avoid schools
I’m told the temperature is different here.
Assuming this isn’t satire… It really depends on where you’re going. Assuming you’ll be in a big city, I’d say it’s pretty comparable to London. Don’t go walking along vacant streets at night, or during the day if the area gives you bad vibes. Avoid confrontation with anyone looking to start some shit. In big crowds I like to keep my wallet and phone in a front or otherwise harder-to-access pocket.
All that being said, most tourist areas are quite safe.
