Honestly, if I can afford it I’m getting it to them whenever other parents are getting it to their kids.
There were plenty of parents who held off on getting things like TV, the Internet, and it had no pronounced effect.
My buddy just had a kid and proudly said “they’re never getting a smartphone.” And I was like “dude you slept over my house to watch porn because you didn’t have Internet in the 90s. You do you, but like… Idk. That won’t go the way you think it will.”
How old are your kids now?
Are you sure it didn’t have any effect? I have seen some kids who wouldn’t put their phone away when they are walking, when they are talking to others , etc. Their attention span is so low they cant even concentrate.
Also the dangers of the internet and what stuff you can find. I will give them a phone when they are old enough to understand that. Maybe 15 -16
Yes, I’m sure. This is a tale as old as time.
Same was said of newspapers. Same was said of television. Same was said of videogames. Same was said of the internet.
Humans get new tool. Old people who grew up without tool look down on young for overusing tool.
I mean sometimes it has /some/ effect. I’m in my late 20s, so was a kid somewhat recently. We grew up without television. We had movies, and we had the Internet, but no TV. My dad didn’t want us mindlessly wasting time on stuff we weren’t even interested in just because it was what was “on right now.” Not to mention the accumulative hours of watching ads.
We all ended up more creative and artistic than our peers, and my relationships with my siblings are stronger than those of my friends. We read a lot (though people I knew with TV also often read a lot so I don’t think that’s necessarily a given, though I know I myself would not have been regularly reading a book a day in middle school if TV had been an option)
I’m just saying limiting time wasted on media is often net positive.
Unrelated to the question but can we please drop the Reddit habit of adding “of Lemmy” to the question? You’re asking Lemmy, no need to add it to every question.
No ill will to OP!
I agree, because these posts have reach beyond just Lemmy, it’s the whole fediverse. No need to address just one platform
Honestly. I don’t know why I found that so fucking annoying but I used to skip posts with that style of title.
Agreed, it’s so cringe
My kids are grown now so my comment probably isn’t all that relevant anymore, but I don’t think there should be a set age to give your kid a smart phone. Different kids mature and learn at different ages, even ones from the same household.
For my kids, I got them their first phones in their early teens but those phones were somewhat restricted so that we could still communicate easily but we knew they couldn’t get into too much trouble with them. As time progressed the restrictions slowly lifted as we knew we could trust them more to not get into trouble with them.
I’ve always believed it’s not a parents duty to protect their child from the world as much as it is to prepare them for it. Of course kids are going to make stupid decisions if you let them go too far (we all have) so I think it’s more about slowly easing them into things and helping them make the right decisions the best we can.
3 kids. 13, 11 and 11 now. 10 years old was what my ex and I did with data plans coming a year after that.
Phone is like any other tool. It is my job as a parent to teach my children the proper way to use it.
My oldest got a smart watch which could make calls only to preset numbers that we added (mom, dad, grandma, aunt, and one neighbor who had a son the same age) at 9. That’s when he started getting dropped off at friends’ houses without a parent sticking around (mind you - this was just coming off COVID lockdowns, so we may have done it sooner if there was a need to). I wanted him to always be able to reach us in any situation. He’s a really responsible kid, so he got a full smartphone the summer after 5th grade (11) when he went on the class trip to Washington DC. Currently in middle school with a smartphone and no issues yet, plus it gives us something valuable to him to take away if we feel he’s letting grades slip, etc.
My second does not seem to share the same level of responsibility, so he did not get his smart watch until 10. He may not get a smartphone anytime soon. It depends on the kid.
My youngest is 8. Time will tell about how responsible he is, but Lord - this is the child that WILL need to call us. Always getting into something 🤦🏻♀️.
It’s shown in school that kids who get phones and tablets before 5 have a hard time using computers with a keyboard and mouse interface.
Having a dumb phone is a current consideration. We have a smart phone on a separate carrier that we loan to a kid on an as needed basis like sleep overs so they can contact us in an emergency.
I’ve told the kids I’ll buy them a smart phone when they can afford the monthly service. It’s not that I can’t, it’s that they will need to learn how to manage money, and having to pay for my pager in the 90s was a good start for me. Not getting it sooner means it won’t feel like a punishment when they start.
They probably said the same thing about riding horses when cars became popular.
Probably but that’s a pretty poor comparison unless you think there’s a near future where the keyboard and mouse interface is relegated to hobbyists. Being able to touch type and work on a multitasking computer are not requirements for all jobs, but will be required skills for a long time for a lot of jobs.
I’ve got twin girls. We held off on smartphones until this past summer when they turned 13.
One couldn’t wait to have a smart phone and now handles her own entire social life through it and is happier than ever now that she can communicate with her friends non stop.
The other simply did not want a phone. We asked a dozen times and she said she wasn’t interested in one and didn’t think she would use it. Since she’s with her twin 75% of the time anyway we decided not to push.
Chaperoned a group of 13-14 yo 8th graders to a school-organized out-of-state civics trip. Only one kid out of ten didn’t have a smartphone. 🤷🏻♂️
We got ours a flip-phone around 11 to coordinate after-school pickup, then a smartphone at 13, mainly because of involvement in cross-country and wanting to know where the kid was. Social apps or gaming with strangers will be disabled until 16.
I guess my kid was 16 when he got his first cell phone. I was 26 before I got my first cell phone. Being older solved this difficult problem for me.
My kids are 5, and Im not sure it’s on the horizon in the next few years. There are no answers here, but I have the same question and have been wondering about how others approach this.
I didn’t haven’t my first phone until 25, and it’s a different, much more connected world now, however.
Teach them how to use a computer first. Phones are very easy to learn eventually
My dad used to throw documents at me to type. They where soo random, I could have sworn I was in his pissing list or something.
Now? I’m thankful! dude i can type fast
A family I know give their kids limited screen time per day on the home laptops. No phones yet.
When they started staying after school for functions like choir or sports and I wanted them to have a way to tell me they were done. It was for their safety but also for my own selfish reasons. Win win.
I would keep a small dumb phone as a family phone for when kids go on trips and sleep overs. They get a personal smartphone at around the age of 16 or 18.
We started at 3y/o. With that said we did so in a controlled way. So the original plan was a tablet but for a fraction of the price we got a very basic smartphone with no service meaning just at home with internet. We started with a max of 20m once a week to make it kind of special but nothing something to become crazy about. Over the years we have given more time for things like chores with a max of 2h a week typically stretched out over the week and some times we would just have a lazy day with it so all 2h in one go. We knew it was tech that she was going to need skills with so we don’t count things like learning math or enligh against the hours allowed. We began practicing how to text and make calls with our phones and routinely make blocked calls when she’s using one of our phones to see what she does and to encourage open communication with us. For us this method has worked amazingly but I know this is not the norm for most.
Mine is almost 12 and I’m not sure she is ready for that. She has an iPad now and her friends all chat via Discord. I have an old phone for 911 calls only.
Depends heavily on where you are (and customs around your community)
For me, my parents gave me a smartphone when I was going to college, I kid you not.
Yes, I wished I had it sooner, but I turned out ok. Glad they didn’t tho. social media additions and withdrawals are real.
Edit: If I get corned with smarty-pants about this, Jakra@aussie.zone’s tactic is the way to go.
