Hi, i thought here is the bestplace to ask about this, is it possible to make new friends on here, what is the most effective way, tell me your experience
Interney isnt a good place to make friends
I don’t think it is a good place to make friends…
Wow. I can’t believe you would say this. I thought we had something special.
Indeed, I’ve somehow made quite a few enemies.
Well, they actually made themselves. Some people just like to get bent out of shape.
Yeah, I seem to spend half of my time here responding to killjoy puritanical misanthropes, which likely says more about me than I’d like to admit.
Don’t get me wrong, there’s many interesting and intelligent folk here, I’m just not sure it’s the best place to find a pal.
Yeah, where we go to meet killjoy sex-positive misanthropes?
Lemmy is for making enemies not friends
Shiii try telling the to reddit.
You’ll probably fare better if you put Lemmy or Fediverse pins or decals on your backpack, laptop or some such.
I know some real-life Fediverse users, but I did not meet them on the Fediverse.Get arrested and share a detention cell together
You do it like you do everywhere else. You strike up a conversation. Lemmy has DMs.
Overall, it’s easy to find lemmy friends. People that you’ll recognize, have conversations with, come to enjoy talking to on lemmy/the fediverse.
But, like any online community, there’s a barrier to cross if you expect to be friends elsewhere. It’s relatively easy to run across folks that will chat on discord or matrix. Harder to find people willing to deanonymize any more than that.
As an example, I’m on the paranoid end of things. I haven’t given my real name out online since maybe 2003? Ish. Since then there’s exactly two people that have crossed from a forum to a full friend. One was from here, lemmy in specific. The other is my wife now, and even that took a year or so to become a friendship back in the mid aughts where I disclosed more than name and general location.
But! There’s been plenty of people on the fediverse that I consider friends to some degree or another. Folks that, even when we disagree, I respect and look forward to interacting with.
My whole recipe for making friends at all, in any context, applies here. Be open to people. Extend trust carefully, but with hope. Accept people for who they are within a given range of acceptability (I ain’t hanging with a Nazi, as an extreme example). The rest is just staying chill, being yourself, and letting things develop naturally.
It’s kinda funny though. My friend I met here? Feels like I’ve known him forever, but it’s only been over a year and a half or so. He went from this rando in a fun conversation to one of the best friends I’ve ever had. Dude knows my wife’s name, my address, my kid’s name. I’ve sent him pictures of me, and I don’t even do that with relatives (though, in honesty it was a temporary thing because I don’t trust any messaging service enough to not delete such things).
So it’s possible for sure. Thing with friendship is that you can never force it if you want it to be real and last. Online or meatspace.
110% this is the way.
I still have friends of nearly 20 years whom I met on the official Wizards of the Coast forums back when those still existed and I’ve managed to meet a handful in person once or twice. I’ve made friends through Discord, fanfic sites, even youtube whom I’ve also met IRL (usually at cons), even if I have been terrible at sticking around sometimes. I’m even making friends on here just by posting and generally being nice and being around, which tbh I wasn’t expecting both because of the low traffic and because of the depersonalized nature of this inherited-from-reddit interface.
Other people have pointed out how lemmy isn’t designed for this.
I’d say, however, you could join a justchat type of community or make your own. These people probably still won’t come to your wedding but you can have friendly conversations.
I’ll go to a random stranger’s wedding for some free food fuck yeah. 3 Idiots type beat
I got one from here, not because we were looking for friendship, it was kind of random. They asked for help/knowledge and I gave some insights and then the thread just grew and grew and we agreed to move out off Lemmy to chat in private. But we are internet friend, we live pretty far from each other and I think it is nice to have those kinds of friendships too.
I am unsure how many actually remember the username of others so having bigger discussions do I think helps a lot. But I have also seen ppl giving a backstory and then just asking to join groups or asked how to find groups, like a dnd group and a lot of ppl invite the person to join them.
I have only ever made friends in person. I came here to type stupid jokes and thoughts and opinions, none of which is cutting edge or interesting enough to engage anyone with. Yelling into this particular void is more a solo effort on my part.
city meetup subs. like https://lemmy.ml/c/phxmeetup .
but the concept is idealistic and has expected flaws.im more interested in a mutal-aid type group to share links and resources for searchengine project. or share knowledge
Yeah it’s not really much of a thing here, I think. I mean it’s possible, but mostly it’s linkspam with occasional banter added.
Any y’all live in OC, CA we can meet up and do something
- Touch grass
- Find a local group of open source enthusaists
- Ask if any of them use Lemmy. If yes, then mission accomplished!
I don’t make new friends on forums. If I were to try, I’d probably find people who post things I’m interested in and DM them.
