As a puppet slowly approached him he held his arm up to the heavens and shouted “Sieg Heil!”.
Mein Furher, save me from the puppets!
Honestly fair to assume that Democrats are puppets of someone. (I’m still mad at Kathy Hochul)
By that logic everyone is a puppet for someone else. If you work for someone you are their puppet, either the boss or the costumer. Politicians should be the puppets of the people they represent, we know they are actually beholden to corporations more often but in theory they are always a puppet. Elon is a puppet to his investors. But comparing everything in such childish, simplified ways is lame because is shows you have a very limited understands of human beings and of how the world works and instead rely on black and white thinking like a junior high student.
Looks exactly like the freak.
You promised investors self-driving cars. You sold thousands of cars to customers while advertising self-driving cars. None of the cars are self-driving. You should be in prison for fraud.
He promised to design a quiet leaf blower. They have that already, Elon. It’s called a rake.
That sounds like a credible threat of violence on Musks’s part. Deport
Damn right
I’m sick and tired of all these foreigners coming to my country, taking my tax dollars and using them on their vanity projects like flying cars and on top of it they threaten me with violence. ICE, arrest that man.
Wait, isn’t this the guy that showed up to work with a black eye and blamed his 5 yo son? https://www.nytimes.com/2025/05/30/us/politics/elon-musk-black-eye.html
Both explanations I’ve heard are pathetic.
- His 5 year old son hit him (maybe trying to stop him from molesting him?)
- Stephen Miller hit him because Elon banged his wife
Both explanations are pretty bad.
Aight. Scrap den.
Are you kidding? The puppets would kick Elon’s ass easily. They are much stronger than him.
Hello puppet seller. I am going into twitter battle, and I want your strongest puppets.
My puppets are too strong for you, traveler.
Make sure you buy puppets rated for fighting an adult man-child born to nazi-apartheid-loving parents.
He ain’t ever carried tools to drop
I heard that his dick is all messed up from a failed enlargement surgery. Its believable because apparently Grimes said it to a friend of hers. Its also believable because Elon has definitely had cosmetic surgery, hair transplants, etc so I can totally see him trying to enlarge his dick and it failing (which isn’t uncommon with such procedures.)
You think he’s get his weight taken care of.
Dear Lord, to have a trillion dollars, and to still look like Jabba the Hutt?
His weird torso shape is almost certainly a combo of him taking a mix of test and high coupled with semi regular liposuction.
Liposuction removes the fat cells whereas losing weight normally just empties them. By removing them you discourage the body from growing them there again as it takes signifcant effort for the body to regrow them. This leads to weird fat distribution.
His total lack of application for diet and weight training means his roid intake doesn’t go where its meant to. Roids just don’t work without signifcant effort, sure those massive meatheads use roids but they also work fucking hard to get massive
Probably, Elon doesn’t strike me as a “real change comes from the inside and takes years of hard work and self-reflection” type of guy.
Pause
Thats what all his romantic partners said
Pause
This guy is the ultimate definition of cringe
You called for me?
Be careful! he studied the blade
Elon Musk has trained in Jiu Jitsu and is cringy and insecure as fuck.
Jonah Hill has trained in Jiu Jitsu and is cringy and insecure as fuck.
Who will survive?
Finally a cage match I’m willing to pay to watch.
I fully believe Jonah Hill could hospitalize me in seconds.
I do not believe that about Musk. At all.
Both are nepo babies. Jonah Hill Feldstein is the son of a movie studio producer. But yeah, I do suspect he could crush Elon if they ever fought. Which is why we, the internet, need to instigate a fight between them.
Sword, meet bullet.
Last year some reporter asked him how he’d been doing and the dude was like “well, at least I didn’t get shoot.”
I guess so Tesla employee tried to hunt him down but got caught. Must be a really awful employer to work for.
Musk is just saying he will come after the lobbyists and large donors of his political critics.
So his other silicon valley tech billionaire buddies?
Whose Jiu Jitsu is stronger? Elon Musk vs Jonah Hill
Probably would be a lot of high-pitch screeching in that match.
Lets be realistic. It would be a slap fight with both of them bawling.
Pfft, all bark and no bite.
Remember the time Elon got pushed down a flight of stairs at school by another student because Elon had been ruthlessly mocking the kid about his dad dying a few days earlier and when Elon insisted that the kid be punished everyone of authority agreed Elon had basically earned it for being such a compassionless prick? I remember. And I talk about it whenever Elon is mentioned so others can learn about how long he’s been a freak for.
What a pathetic limp dicked dipshit. lol.
Thats the rumor. Sounds like a botched dick enlargement surgery according to the tweets.
