Thanks to the commentator who provided an uncensored version - have a bonus meme
I love having spiders in my residence. Sometimes I find them stuck in the bathtub or sink and I save them and let them go free. Like yes my spider bro, keep eating the fruit flies and other annoying bugs. I like the little creepy centipede looking bugs also because they eat bedbugs and other insects. (Spiders and other natural predators of bedbugs will not mitigate an active bed bug infestation.)
House spiders are almost exclusively harmless and gain a terrible reputation. Down here in the south east we have an abundance of orb weaver spiders.
Absolutely gorgeous and, for the most part, totally harmless. I genuinely don’t understand why people are so terrified of these things. Spiders are one of the reasons we’re not completely overrun with insects and other pests, and most species would much rather avoid us than have anything to do with us.
The brown recluse and black widow should obviously be treated with respect, but even they are highly misunderstood. Neither species is particularly aggressive toward humans, and bites are relatively uncommon. They generally bite only when threatened, trapped against the skin, or otherwise disturbed. Their reputation is considerably worse than their actual behavior.
Spiders aren’t out looking for people to bite. They’re predators doing an extremely useful job of keeping insect populations under control. Unless you have a medically significant species in your home, there’s usually very little reason to be afraid of them and quite a few reasons to appreciate them.
I love spiders, but they still creep me out. So I prefer to bring them away if they’re in my house. Garage is neutral territory, mostly. But when a Wolf Spider and I both scare the crap out of each other, it gives me heebie jeebies tho
My cat was getting into the basement at my exes house, and the spiders SENT A FUCKING MESSAGE. They got their biggest guy to come up and perch on the toilet paper in the bathroom. I decided I didn’t need to pee and secured the basement door better from then on.
I had to evict the jumping spider that lived in my curtains for 2 years because I was moving, I felt terrible. That little lady worked hard and earned her place, I offered to bring her to the new apartment, but she declined, I wish her the best.
can learn our routines
The spiders in my room are very concerned about how little sleep I’m getting and how irregular my bedtime is
What about car mirrors?
Are the garages any different from people and houses, vs caves and tents?
Sounds like it’s the spider’s house.
Spider: You exist because we allow it. You will end because we demand it.
I kinda miss the wolf spider that lived in my bathroom window. Such a chill little roommate. It just kinda showed up one day, set up its little web, and we each just minded our own business.
I kept my showers short, never opened the window, and if I swatted a fly in the kitchen, I’d deposit it in its web. Never gave me much in return. But that’s fine. I was just happy to have its company.
I had a spider who lived under my shower basin at a previous house. I never bothered him and he must have been eating something since he hung around for a long time. Cool dude.
Good luck to the spiders trying to learn the routine I don’t have.
Your spider will be scheduling an ADHD diagnosis appointment for you soon.
“Sir, it doesn’t appear to exist.”
“That’s impossible, Wilkins. Run your test again. You can forget about lunch.”
“I’ve run it 7 times, sir. It’s…his days are totally…random. Anyway, they’re serving Eggplant. No thank you.”
“My God, Wilkins. We’re doomed. Did they have any chicken fingers?”
What an absolute vibe. Same here.
Took the existing uncensored fuck and copy/pasted it over the engagement bait censorship
Thank you for your service
Shoutout to the censored version censoring the word Fuck but not Fucking.
At one point in my life I was living in a dank California basement room, spending 99% of my time in bed due to a severe mental health crisis, 2 years straight.
One night I saw a spider chilling at the bottom of one of my bedposts. I took a picture of it and went back to bed.
8 years later I used image search to identify what kind of spider it was.
It was a brown recluse the size of my hand.
Let this be a lesson in not trusting overconfident bullshit machines haha
A black spider set up house in the corner of my bathroom next to the automatic nightlight at the start of summer. He/she(?) has been quite successful at hunting flies. There is a pile below the web of about 15 or 20 tiny black packages, neatly wrapped. I almost never see flies in the house, I don’t know how the spider has caught so many--yes, I understand those two things are related, but it seems like I’d see them flying around before they got caught in the web. Also, I’m not certain they’re flies, but they all look the same and are about the right size, and I don’t know what else they could be, I don’t see any other bugs in the house.
Anyhoo, I’m debating what I should do about the spider, if anything. One is fine, but I do not want hundreds more.
Spider bro!
Most likely a female spider, if it‘s actively hunting!
Yeah. I wasn’t sure, but I thought that was the case.
You sure those aren’t mouse droppings?
I know mouse droppings. These are not mouse droppings.
We had a big spider that did similar outside the bathroom window. Every time somebody went in at night to use the can, lights on=bugs in web.
I was sad when fall came and that spider died. She was a clever one
I have figured cockroaches do the same
Not the ones I knew in life
My garage has vents to the outside, so those bastards tend to come in at will through them at night. Every now and then, I’ll have a late night at the bars, and they get to meet the bottom of my shoe or a propane torch. I don’t care how “considerate” they are being.
