Branches and other small cylinders can be sized using M&M tubes
Banana for scale
Tear off the branch and measure the total length.
Method C. Sounding rod depth required to hit the prostate.
I know it sounds odd to do this on a tree, but trust me, it works.
Thrust*
THE CYLINDER MUST NOT BE HARMED!!!
I’m not sure how amused I am that I understand this reference.
What if there is a knot at the base of the branch?
it took me way to long to realize y’all talking about penises …
That’s so innocent. Almost like a certain mythical character before opening her eponymous box…
I thought it was optimal street pathways at first, then trees, then got surprised by the amount of genitalia referencing comments then I “realised” thanks to this comment TT
This was my process exactly!
Well, it’s two of us.
Half the length plus seven
Woop woop, 7.5cm! A personal best.
I would use 0,5x(A+B) because chicks dig a big branch.
I’ll ask the branch manager.
I can’t use method B, the tree fruit are in the way.
This can be easily calculated by the formula [(length x diameter) + (Weight / Girth)] / Angle of Tip^2
This is the way. You have to account for the yaw of the shaft
Personally I start measuring from the middle of my taint 😌
Since the internet began it’s been known that you always measure asshole to tip.
Literally how every guy on Grindr measures…
Ah, my misunderstanding
This changes everything
You have to push the branch down with one hand, such that it is perpendicular to the trunk. With the other hand place a ruler to measure trunk to tip via method A. This gives the honest expectation of ''usable" length.
What if there’s a … um … protuberance on the bottom where the branch meets the trunk? What’s the correct measuring procedure in that case?
It’s critical the cylinder not be harmed
