One thing for me was how light hearted and funny Lenin was. I expected it to be really hard going like a lot of Marx but he had such a wit about him and I remember laughing out loud a few times by his turn of phrase. I don’t think he gets enough credit for it, he took a really serious, dry subject and made it enjoyable to read. He really was an incredible writer.
The many literary references in Capital surprised me. Gotta say, Marx got good taste. I don’t get the humor most of the time since english isn’t my first language, but most of Lenin and Marx’s work isn’t as difficult as most people say it would be and you will always find something new on a re-read.
On a deeper note, as someone who used to struggle with chronic loneliness, reading about theory and the history of class struggle filled me with so much revolutionary optimism. It’s like I’m never alone anymore. I thought I’m gonna be all nihilistic afterwards but I finally found the human connection I’ve lost years ago.
Yes, anticommunist “leftism” is such a major downer, the real thing is inspiring and hopeful.
You said you struggled with chronic loneliness. I’m doing that right now. Long story short: I was given the short end of the straw when in comes to socializing growing up. Never made friends and never learned love. I was at my wits end for a long time and ready to end it. Because I was thrown into this system of selling myself for an hourly wage. Never having time to enjoy the things I missed. I ended up in a very bad place mentally. I really thought that was it. Just exist to produce enough money to exist another day to produce enough money… You know? It feels worthless.
But reading about the problems in our society and the fact that we have solutions to them, and there are people trying to fight to make those solutions happen?
That just fills me with hope.
Che was right when he said revolution is born from great feelings of love. So many generations before us are willing to sacrifice their life for a future they don’t get to see. I don’t know about you, but I feel very loved and comforted by that fact.