What words, phrases or signs do you use and how do you get your partner’s attention?

  • 1bluepixel
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    382 years ago

    My spouse and I lived in a bunch of countries over the years. We speak Quebec French, English, and Spanish, as well as a smattering of Chinese, Bulgarian, Korean, and a few odds and ends here and there.

    We basically speak whatever we think people around us won’t understand. Very colloquial Quebec French in non-French-speaking countries, Chinese around white people, Bulgarian around non-white people, or even a cryptic mix of everything when we’re not completely sure.

    We figure anyone who understands is probably someone we want to know… Hasn’t happened very often, but it does happen. So far we weren’t saying anything overly embarrassing when we got caught, but we sure as hell have no filter between us because of this!

    • Drusas
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      512 years ago

      I’ve taught my husband to speak a bit of Japanese, but we don’t use it this way because that’s extremely rude.

      • 1bluepixel
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        2 years ago

        I wouldn’t say we speak in people’s faces, but we make comments to each other about random stuff. I would never say something rude about somebody in their faces, but my spouse might go, “Can we go back to the hotel, I really need to take a shit” or something silly and unfiltered like that.

        • Drusas
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          92 years ago

          I get it, I just still think it’s rude and avoid doing so myself.

          • @putoelquelolea@lemmy.ml
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            22 years ago

            It’s rude for spouses to have a private conversation? Would whispering be better? Would it be better if they hid in a cupboard where no one could see them?

            • Drusas
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              22 years ago

              It is rude to intentionally speak in a language that the people around you don’t understand (especially if you’re doing so specifically because they don’t understand it), yes.

      • radix
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        92 years ago

        That’s probably a cultural thing, isn’t it? In diverse areas, people don’t expect to understand what they hear others say, so there’s no “Speak ___; we’re in ___” culture.

        • @AstridWipenaugh@lemmy.world
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          222 years ago

          I’d say it’s more of a context thing. If you’re hanging out in a group of people chatting together and you code switch to speak to someone so nobody else can understand, that’s rude. If you’re just speaking to someone in another language on your own, nobody cares (except xenophobic bigots).

          • radix
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            92 years ago

            Oh, that makes sense. I didn’t consider anyone would do that.

        • @Ashtear@lemm.ee
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          22 years ago

          Definitely an American thing. Wide swaths of the country have issues with any kind of diversity.

    • digitalgadget
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      152 years ago

      I love those videos where people are caught trying to have a private conversation by someone who speaks an unexpected language! Also it’s shocking to me how many people loudly speak common dialects of Chinese and don’t expect anyone to follow… literally over a billion humans can understand Mandarin, someone is listening.

      • 1bluepixel
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        2 years ago

        Haha, I’ve caught plenty of Chinese speakers having what they presume are private conversations in my presence, and sometimes even about me. People just automatically assume non-Asians can’t speak Chinese, even when these non-Asians live in China.

        • This happens to me sometimes as I lived in enough places that I understand a lot of common stuff in various European languages even though I don’t speak them beyond ordering a beer or whatever.