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Lots of people in here talking about the false dichotomy completely missing the point of the post: Society puts a lot of pressure for people to be extroverted but not the other way around.
Well, somebody could argument that being social is a necessary/desirable skill for individuals of a species that needs communities to survive/thrive
You called it a “skill”, it’s not a skill.
Also, as so many people lie somewhere a long the spectrum, and most in the middle, introversion is clearly a useful " skill" as well, or it would have been selected out of the gene pool long, long ago.
So, what are you trying to say again?
First: I am not attacking you.
Second: many disadvantageous traits that today exist, such as illnesses, exist today despite natural selection. So your dicotomy falls apart.
Third: unlike other “lonely” mammals, humans are known to have evolved in communities: they hunt, defend, and bear offspring in communities (plenty of research work on that). Therefore, social bonds are necessary for survival. Therefore, an individual for which establishing those bonds is comparatively easy, has an advantage.
Fourth: a great deal of the human brain is devoted to communication with other humans. Supporting point three.
Fifth: An obnoxious and loud person that consumes the oxygen of the room is NOT an “extrovert”. That’s is a moron. I am not aware of research done on that, but I have no doubts either.
Sixth: Being able to spend time with yourself and meditate about your actions, your emotions, and what happens around you without the necessity of yapping about it, is a skill that many people so desperately need.
Kudos, my fellow human :)
I hate that our society endlessly rewards people that are highly social, early birds with money. I didn’t grow up with any of that.
“Learn how to shut the fuck up for like 30 seconds.”
Introversion feels so mainstream now. Anybody remember the “antisocial social club” sweaters? Or all the pop songs about feeling left out at the club/party (Lorde and Charlie XCX have a few of these I think).
I’m pretty sure the internet has a big part to do with it. The introverts loved the internet. You could lurk, find communities around niche interests, post anonymously, etc. And then the internet blew up, and the internet veterans became the cool ones.
Internet veteran, and not even a properly old one I just remember AOL on CDs: nah we aren’t cool, the net is full of normies now.
I remember explaining to a friend that you don’t have to pay for AOL or Microsoft Online to use the internet. And installing TCPIP into the network, and adding dogpile to a browser for them. Flabbergasted.
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I’ve got a couple that have made it, but most of mine hover in the 200-500 range
I’m old and late to the neurodivergent thing. It’s been interesting and a little comforting to realize that I’m not as weird and alone as I once thought. I’ve struggled most of my life, not greatly, but still a struggle, to “fit in” with extroverts, because that’s all I’ve seen.Those who are more extrovert are loud and insistent and everywhere it seems, so it’s hard to see the rest of us, sometimes, in spite of apparently making up 30% or likely more of the population.
It would have been nice to come to this understanding when I was a teenager when I was really struggling, but that can’t be changed.
To the extroverts: you’re not superior, you’re just different, the same way introverts are not superior, or inferior, just different. I’d wager that the more introverted among us have made much of what we take for granted possible. We’re the scientists and engineers, and a bit ironically the ones who are more curious and thoughtful about the world.
There was the “you’re an extroverted-introvert” or opposite label also going around for a while, to describe people in the middle.
Best way I heard it described was introverts need quiet time to feel refreshed, while extroverts need social time to recharge. This helps me understand my wife better. I need wind down time, she needs the constant chatter. It is a challenging compromise sometimes 😀
“You get an ostentatious personality! And you get an ostentatious personality!” /s
for true. we have become so addicted to external stimulation, that it has become a bad thing to keep to yourself
Fuck Oprah and her dumb fucking magazine.
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The spelling is extraverts. Please
Not really.
We’ve checked six standard dictionaries and all of them list “extrovert” as the principal spelling for someone with an outgoing or gregarious personality, though five include “extravert” as an acceptable variant.
- per Grammarphobia
Extravert, on the other hand, is another way of saying extrovert that was originally used by Carl Jung. […] it appears the most common and proper way to use the term outside of technical journals is with the “o,” though who knows; maybe this will develop into an Oxford comma situation.
- per Writer’s Digest
extravert noun /ˈekstrəvɜːt/ /ˈekstrəvɜːrt/ (also more frequent extrovert)
Extraverts are extroverts that are too extra.
Thank you for your research. TIL. Language evolves. It’s my understanding that the original spelling came from intro (inside) and extra (outside). But that’s not a rabbit hole I want to dive in now. (I’ll still read introvert with an a in my head. Too old/stubborn to change that ;))
“1. Just say hello! It really is that easy. Saying hello to someone you just met can make you seem friendly and engaging.”
I am friendly and engaging but there’s not a lot of gas in that tank so I typically conserve it for existing friends and family. Strangers get quiet courtesy and won’t be shamed into being different.
Oh trust me people are bad at speaking as it is, you guys go full don’t talk until spoken to ain’t nobody gonna ever say a word again. Good luck in need any communicative moments, gosh you all are just afraid of the fact that your introverted nature has to do with how you feel about yourself and the value of your words. Also, extrovert normally is someone trying to keep things light or spoken up on so we don’t get away with bad stuff. So nah. I bartended events with 10s of thousands of people I’m a talker, you need us.
Yes, LemmySchpemmy, keep talking. Do your thing. There’s nothing I’d like more to read and answer to. People like you are needed to get all the attention they need.
So, I hope I shielded the bait for everybody else.
