Plus the toilet tank takes 6 minutes to refill.
But you flush again after 2 minutes…doh!So you go to turn the flow valve, but it breaks off in your hand. Now the poop won’t flush and you’ve got to get out of the house to hit the main valve (or flee. Lots of folk choose flee) with no one noticing your clothes are covered in poop water
I just put new toilets in my house and they fill up so fast now, like 20 seconds 
Ok we can’t ask you back because you did not share your drugs
If its just a floaty poop. drape TP over it in a V shape. Maybe 6 squares. Then flush. TP gets sucked down and takes that shit straight to hell.
What if the tp combusts between me putting it down and me flushing?
Trust me, you just Mitch Mcconnell that shit. Works every time.
I’ve never tried filibustering my shit down the drain, but I can’t say it’s never worked either…
Shit McCommode
I did that at a house warming for one of my girlfriends friends. I just came out of the bathroom and told her we needed to go now.
you mean go to get a plunger?
you mean go to get a plunger, right?
you mean go to get a plunger, left?
No, right.
dude, we’re using the plunger wrong, it goes up and down, not left to right
Yep repeatedly and forcefully. Wish did we upon a metaphor
Instructions unclear, plunger stuck in butt.
quietly moans
You mean go to get a plunger, up?
“Babe you’re going to need a new friend”
Inform your host and help them pack up their things. It is the poop’s house now.
They’re smart, they’re organized, and they have my keys.
It has to be an emergency, unless they also have a bidet
And if they have a Toto I’m inviting myself over just to poop.
I guess it rains down in Africa 🎶 flush, overflowing
If they have a Toto, not for long they don’t. I have a Toto now.
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At my job they have those toilets with compressed air. Not a plunger in sight but it’s never been a problem for me. And I’m a large man with large poops.
The fucking what?!
NGL I’ve mentally trained myself not to poop outside of home. My body seems to agree because I’ve only pooped twice outside of home since the last time I’ve done so when i was a toddler!
You don’t even poop at work?
Only once!
That’s wild
You’re missing out on thousands of dollars worth of paid poop breaks!
