I’ve spent a lot of time with Open Source Programmers and other nerds, including in person, and I believe at least some of the issue is that some of them feel grooming and hygiene is purely aesthetic, bordering on “shallow”. Like the way many of us think about Looksmaxxing or cosmetic surgery.
Like, you spend a bunch of time and money doing your hair or washing your clothes? That time didn’t improve your card playing, it didn’t teach you anything new. Shouldn’t people be judged by what’s inside instead of what’s outside? Shouldn’t people be judged by their skill or merit rather than their looks?
And I intentionally wrote that last one to feel borderline, because I think a lot of people do feel that way, and do believe those things, but not to the same extent. Their boundary for “hygenic enough” requires clean. And maybe the folks I’m characterizing don’t know that it’s actively unpleasant to be around someone who smells bad? Or maybe they’re so steeped in it they don’t know how bad it is?
Tangentially, this is one of the reasons some fem people struggle in these spaces. Any amount of eye-shadow, nice shirt, or hair-style is deemed as “superfluous”, and so any person who spends their time and money on such things is regarded with suspicion. They’re an idiot who wastes their time on looks at best, not to be trusted making other decisions, or a charlatan trying to trick lesser men with their wiles at worst. Those are the only two choices, because there’s no other imaginable reason someone could do these things.
Funny thing is that they end up dressing and styling in a similar manner while looking down on people who deviate from the unspoken dress code. By rejecting fashion they are making a conscious choice in the way they dress and are therefore participating in fashion.
I’m sorry but that type of think is delusional. Like because, taking a shower or washing your clothes doesn’t make you better at cards (why would it??) you don’t need to do it, why would these things be related? They serve completely different purposes. It sounds more like justifications to not do something they don’t enjoy or don’t want to do.
It is, yeah. It’s also what they believe. It’s sort of a sour grapes situation.
For most people, this kind of behavior is socialized out of them by the time they reach adulthood. But a lot of YuGiOh players, and players of other kinds, do not leave their house. To such a person, getting ready to go out requires maybe an hour or more of prep time, mostly because they don’t know what they’re doing, for what feels like 5 minutes of play at grocery store. They would think of this as superfluous and pointless.
A point of similarity I know will ruffle a few feathers: do you make your bed every day?
No I don’t. Why should I? My bed sheets being made or messy doesnt impact anyone else and it barely impacts me. It’s just not a valid comparison to having simple bodily hygiene when going outside.
Hold your horses, there’s no need to get defensive.
I didn’t bring that up to suggest people should—I don’t—I’m just provoking a bit of thought.
You don’t see any similarities at all between making sure you’re shaved, showered, well-dressed, maybe perfumed a bit, before going outside; and making sure your bed is clean, well-kept, and presentable?
You probably don’t invite friends into your bedroom.
So let’s ask a similar question: do you clean your living room before inviting guests over? What is the purpose of that? There’s a good chance you care about it being clean more than they do, so why bother?
That wasn’t in a defensive tone lol. Sorry about not writing clearly enough.
I don’t really see many similarities between making sure I’m clean before going outside and keeping my bed made. Keeping my bed clean? Sure. But spesifically keeping the bedsheets made? Not really. (Messy bedsheets doesnt make a bed “dirty”)
I would clean my living room before inviting guests, yes, however I still dont think thats much of a comparison to bedsheets specifically. The purpose of cleaning the living room before having guests is so that I have a nice space for my guests. There’s a social incentive. I ain’t presenting my bed to anyone often, so there isn’t really a social incentive for me to make the sheets.
I guess it comes down to what makes an individual feel orderly and clean. We clean our bodies to be presentable, but also to feel clean (and be healthy). The former reason isn’t very applicable to making the bedsheets most of the time, but the latter can be.
Edit: I just realised the absurdity of my end conclusion somehow being “I guess ppl have preferences huh”
It’s been so many hours, so I don’t know if I really remember my purpose, but I think it was something like: can you get yourself into a headspace where making your bed seems like a pleasant thing to do?
'Cause I can, even though I don’t.
I don’t live in the 1600s, so it’s hard to imagine what consequences not making my own bed would have; and though I think they’re wrong, the unshowered yugioh player probably feels similarly. They’d have to be taught otherwise.
Your whole premise relies on them failing basic biology class (or somehow skipping out on the microbiology part?) because hygiene is also just about basic health.
So either they’re all very stupid when it comes to basic health, or there’s multiple issues or some other major one.
I’ve spent a lot of time with Open Source Programmers and other nerds, including in person, and I believe at least some of the issue is that some of them feel grooming and hygiene is purely aesthetic, bordering on “shallow”. Like the way many of us think about Looksmaxxing or cosmetic surgery.
Like, you spend a bunch of time and money doing your hair or washing your clothes? That time didn’t improve your card playing, it didn’t teach you anything new. Shouldn’t people be judged by what’s inside instead of what’s outside? Shouldn’t people be judged by their skill or merit rather than their looks?
And I intentionally wrote that last one to feel borderline, because I think a lot of people do feel that way, and do believe those things, but not to the same extent. Their boundary for “hygenic enough” requires clean. And maybe the folks I’m characterizing don’t know that it’s actively unpleasant to be around someone who smells bad? Or maybe they’re so steeped in it they don’t know how bad it is?
Tangentially, this is one of the reasons some fem people struggle in these spaces. Any amount of eye-shadow, nice shirt, or hair-style is deemed as “superfluous”, and so any person who spends their time and money on such things is regarded with suspicion. They’re an idiot who wastes their time on looks at best, not to be trusted making other decisions, or a charlatan trying to trick lesser men with their wiles at worst. Those are the only two choices, because there’s no other imaginable reason someone could do these things.
Funny thing is that they end up dressing and styling in a similar manner while looking down on people who deviate from the unspoken dress code. By rejecting fashion they are making a conscious choice in the way they dress and are therefore participating in fashion.
Same thing with the “punk rock” look. It’s so not punk.
I’m sorry but that type of think is delusional. Like because, taking a shower or washing your clothes doesn’t make you better at cards (why would it??) you don’t need to do it, why would these things be related? They serve completely different purposes. It sounds more like justifications to not do something they don’t enjoy or don’t want to do.
It is, yeah. It’s also what they believe. It’s sort of a sour grapes situation.
For most people, this kind of behavior is socialized out of them by the time they reach adulthood. But a lot of YuGiOh players, and players of other kinds, do not leave their house. To such a person, getting ready to go out requires maybe an hour or more of prep time, mostly because they don’t know what they’re doing, for what feels like 5 minutes of play at grocery store. They would think of this as superfluous and pointless.
A point of similarity I know will ruffle a few feathers: do you make your bed every day?
No I don’t. Why should I? My bed sheets being made or messy doesnt impact anyone else and it barely impacts me. It’s just not a valid comparison to having simple bodily hygiene when going outside.
Hold your horses, there’s no need to get defensive.
I didn’t bring that up to suggest people should—I don’t—I’m just provoking a bit of thought.
You don’t see any similarities at all between making sure you’re shaved, showered, well-dressed, maybe perfumed a bit, before going outside; and making sure your bed is clean, well-kept, and presentable?
You probably don’t invite friends into your bedroom.
So let’s ask a similar question: do you clean your living room before inviting guests over? What is the purpose of that? There’s a good chance you care about it being clean more than they do, so why bother?
That wasn’t in a defensive tone lol. Sorry about not writing clearly enough.
I don’t really see many similarities between making sure I’m clean before going outside and keeping my bed made. Keeping my bed clean? Sure. But spesifically keeping the bedsheets made? Not really. (Messy bedsheets doesnt make a bed “dirty”)
I would clean my living room before inviting guests, yes, however I still dont think thats much of a comparison to bedsheets specifically. The purpose of cleaning the living room before having guests is so that I have a nice space for my guests. There’s a social incentive. I ain’t presenting my bed to anyone often, so there isn’t really a social incentive for me to make the sheets.
I guess it comes down to what makes an individual feel orderly and clean. We clean our bodies to be presentable, but also to feel clean (and be healthy). The former reason isn’t very applicable to making the bedsheets most of the time, but the latter can be.
Edit: I just realised the absurdity of my end conclusion somehow being “I guess ppl have preferences huh”
My point exactly. :p
It’s been so many hours, so I don’t know if I really remember my purpose, but I think it was something like: can you get yourself into a headspace where making your bed seems like a pleasant thing to do?
'Cause I can, even though I don’t.
I don’t live in the 1600s, so it’s hard to imagine what consequences not making my own bed would have; and though I think they’re wrong, the unshowered yugioh player probably feels similarly. They’d have to be taught otherwise.
Your whole premise relies on them failing basic biology class (or somehow skipping out on the microbiology part?) because hygiene is also just about basic health.
So either they’re all very stupid when it comes to basic health, or there’s multiple issues or some other major one.