OhNoMoreLemmy@lemmy.ml to Not The Onion@lemmy.worldEnglish · 3 days agoDisappointed Christians say God is delaying the Rapture until Epstein Files are releasedwww.dailystar.co.ukexternal-linkmessage-square96linkfedilinkarrow-up1956arrow-down19
arrow-up1947arrow-down1external-linkDisappointed Christians say God is delaying the Rapture until Epstein Files are releasedwww.dailystar.co.ukOhNoMoreLemmy@lemmy.ml to Not The Onion@lemmy.worldEnglish · 3 days agomessage-square96linkfedilink
minus-squaregivesomefucks@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up120·3 days agoWeird… According to the Bible no man, no angel, not even Jesus Christ himself knows when the rapture will be… Huge fan of whoever convinced them to blame it on trump not releasing the Epstein files tho.
minus-squaredisguy_ovahea@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up76·3 days agoThere’s no such mention of the rapture at all in the Bible. It was invented in the 19th century. https://www.neh.gov/article/rise-rapture-horror-culture
minus-squareKühlschrank@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up33·3 days agoIt was invented to distract us from the Trump/Epstein files
minus-squareIphtashuFitz@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up4·3 days ago “Life was filled with guns and war,” the song begins, “and everyone got trampled on the floor. I wish we’d all been ready.” Wow, sounds like we’re already living it today…
minus-squareceenote@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up16·edit-23 days ago“Clearly, when he wrote with his own hand that no man would know the day or the hour, the Lord wasn’t counting on a genius like me coming along.” a whole shitload of different preachers Joking aside, how do whole congregations avoid seeing the narcissism on some of these motherfuckers?
minus-squareMNByChoice@midwest.sociallinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up7·edit-23 days agoThe ones that could self selected out. (Or were kicked out.)
minus-squareThaurin@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up1·edit-22 days agoWhich is strange, because Jesus is God and God is all knowing… Also what disguy was saying of course.
minus-squarescarabic@lemmy.worldlinkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up1·3 days agoBut surely it won’t happen until after God sees those files. They might affect who gets raptured. /s
Weird…
According to the Bible no man, no angel, not even Jesus Christ himself knows when the rapture will be…
Huge fan of whoever convinced them to blame it on trump not releasing the Epstein files tho.
There’s no such mention of the rapture at all in the Bible. It was invented in the 19th century.
https://www.neh.gov/article/rise-rapture-horror-culture
It was invented to distract us from the Trump/Epstein files
Wow, sounds like we’re already living it today…
“Clearly, when he wrote with his own hand that no man would know the day or the hour, the Lord wasn’t counting on a genius like me coming along.”
Joking aside, how do whole congregations avoid seeing the narcissism on some of these motherfuckers?
The ones that could self selected out. (Or were kicked out.)
Which is strange, because Jesus is God and God is all knowing…
Also what disguy was saying of course.
But surely it won’t happen until after God sees those files. They might affect who gets raptured. /s