This didn’t happen to me.
Leave. Straight up irish goodbye. There’ll be more parties if you don’t have a rep for literally smelling like shit. Toss the underwear on the way home.
I’m surprised this isn’t the only answer.
I’ve heard a story about this after party where things were getting a bit raunchy and at some point they where sitting naked on the couch. Apparently one of the guys kind of shit himself and he decided to just not move an inch. When everyone else took a smoke break, he left the party and with that an accompanying shit stain in the couch.
Needless to say that he didn’t really get any new invites after that
This didn’t happen to me.
Imagine OP in the broom closet with shit-stained pants while the party’s roaring outside
They’re gonna be roaring at ol’ Poopy Pants the moment they realize what happened.
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Depends how drunk and if I maybe have a chance with making out.
First instinct would be go to restroom, remove my underwear and throw them in the trashcan, wipe myself and use any fragrance I can find. Next grab a beer and say someone threw their dirty underwear in the bathroom trash.
Until they line everyone up for underwear inspection.
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Hop in the shower, steal some pants from a drawer.
Take a shower and wash the pants in the shower. Shit is water-soluble, that is to say it can dissolve in water. I think there may be some oil in it but it soups wash out. What doesn’t go down the shower drain, move by hand to the toilet and wash your hands.
Now you have wet pants. In the northern hemisphere it’s still summer, so they should dry relatively quickly outside. Play it off somehow. Be the guy or gal who fell in the pool.
Tl;dr jumped in pool with pants shid
What doesn’t go down the shower drain, move by hand to the toilet and wash your hands.
I’ll just leave this here.
Thank you for letting me be a part of your education. Knowledge is power.
Edit from commercial link to wiktionary.
FYI to others: the above comment is an advertisement.
Oh. My bad. It was just a quick search and I pulled up a link that explained it . My bad. Will fix.
Well, if I was Donald Trump, I’d blame Biden.
Step 1 is make sure that doesn’t happen to you.
Quietly make an exit unannounced and then throw out everything if you drive on a clean side.
Take off your pants, and use the shit to write an apology letter on the wall… Then leave the house with no pants on, clutching the poop. Remember to put dots of shit behind you just in case you get lost on your way home, or if that hot person at the party wants to follow you home. Your sent is strong, I’m quite sure someone will be motivated enough to follow the obvious signs of seduction you’re dripping.
Found Kaitlin Bennett’a alt account
What room are you in? This plays a critical role in the decision making process.
You’re in a bedroom, steal some undies and put your dirty drawers in their drawers. Easy.
Kitchen is different. You need to mask the smell and divert from your poopy pants. Ergo, offer to make margaritas, then throw in as much fragrant stuff as you can, and run the blender with no lid on max. You want to splash as many petite as possible to hide your potentially soiled pants.
Bathroom you can wash up. Easy. Maybe dump your undies because they won’t dry very fast.
put your dirty drawers in their drawers. Easy.
Omg I feel like this is one of the worst ways to go lol!!! Surely you can find a way to throw them in a bin somewhere instead.
Depends on the type of party and whose house it is.
Each type of situation deserves its own response.
