Of course I can speak. I spend fifteen minutes practicing my order in my head first, of course. And then yeah, I probably get the words on the wrong order. But they’re all mostly there.
This morning I spent like 1 minute in a meeting wanting to say something scrolling in my head but the mouth was not cooperating at all with the words, so after a bunch of time and noises I just say “fuck the words” which actually worked and only then after pausing and waiting for the mouth to sync properly was I finally able to speak.
When people talk about inner monologues, mine is just literally scripting. The worst is after social interaction, where my brain has to ruminate over it and script for the next time. Stupid brain won’t stop, and all the way home, sometimes even sounds and gestures leak out as my brain frantically scripts and I hate it. Like, just shut up, brain!
For whatever it’s worth, whenever I am finally able to understand thoughts that come from a way different context than my own it is super satisfying. It’s like finding a hidden world that was underneath my feet all along.
“I have one main point I want to convey with five points of supporting evidence but actually each of those require arguing and some qualifications and point 4 is an essential part of the argument for point 1 and all of this reminds me of a funny conversation in a tv show that to me does a better job of explaining it but if you haven’t seen it what’s really important about that show is that it came out at the height of the War on Terror and -”
You probably stopped listening around the word “supporting” and I don’t blame you for that
Aphasia sucks. There’s a dam between my brain and my mouth and sometimes the right word gets caught on it so I have to start throwing out cinnamon rolls
It was a big problem for me for a long time. The words are in my head, but my mouth couldn’t articulate the sounds and sometimes it was literal nonsense sounds that came out my mouth.
Weirdly enough, it turned out that I had a sensitivity to eggs that was making that (and my mental health) a lot worse.*
Even now, ten years on, when I can articulate a long sentence without tripping over my words, it still feels like a little victory.
This is a completely different thing from mutism btw.
*Unfortunately, the price of lower anxiety and better speech was losing a lot of my neutral/useful autistic traits as well.
I don’t get it. People can’t speak?
I understand not wanting to speak, but not the lack of ability.
Of course I can speak. I spend fifteen minutes practicing my order in my head first, of course. And then yeah, I probably get the words on the wrong order. But they’re all mostly there.
This morning I spent like 1 minute in a meeting wanting to say something scrolling in my head but the mouth was not cooperating at all with the words, so after a bunch of time and noises I just say “fuck the words” which actually worked and only then after pausing and waiting for the mouth to sync properly was I finally able to speak.
Fifteen? Is that it?
When people talk about inner monologues, mine is just literally scripting. The worst is after social interaction, where my brain has to ruminate over it and script for the next time. Stupid brain won’t stop, and all the way home, sometimes even sounds and gestures leak out as my brain frantically scripts and I hate it. Like, just shut up, brain!
I’m autistic,and yes, I sometimes can’t speak.
I try to say something, but instead it comes out in a way no one can understand.
For whatever it’s worth, whenever I am finally able to understand thoughts that come from a way different context than my own it is super satisfying. It’s like finding a hidden world that was underneath my feet all along.
“I have one main point I want to convey with five points of supporting evidence but actually each of those require arguing and some qualifications and point 4 is an essential part of the argument for point 1 and all of this reminds me of a funny conversation in a tv show that to me does a better job of explaining it but if you haven’t seen it what’s really important about that show is that it came out at the height of the War on Terror and -”
You probably stopped listening around the word “supporting” and I don’t blame you for that
The problem is thoughts are a web, and speech is a line. Someday I hope we will be able to brain dump through our neural implants.
Oh no… Imagine tiktok content in those times
You’re trying to say you truly don’t understand the concept of getting tongue tied?..
Aphasia sucks. There’s a dam between my brain and my mouth and sometimes the right word gets caught on it so I have to start throwing out cinnamon rolls
It’s common in neurodivergent people.
It was a big problem for me for a long time. The words are in my head, but my mouth couldn’t articulate the sounds and sometimes it was literal nonsense sounds that came out my mouth.
Weirdly enough, it turned out that I had a sensitivity to eggs that was making that (and my mental health) a lot worse.*
Even now, ten years on, when I can articulate a long sentence without tripping over my words, it still feels like a little victory.
This is a completely different thing from mutism btw.
*Unfortunately, the price of lower anxiety and better speech was losing a lot of my neutral/useful autistic traits as well.