• @dingleberry@discuss.tchncs.de
    link
    fedilink
    1462 years ago

    Let’s not start the cult of /r/nofap here. And no, you are not suddenly more charismatic and confident. You are just not reeking of cum all the time, something achievable with regular showers as well.

    • XIIIesq
      link
      fedilink
      762 years ago

      No fap is retarded, but watching less porn isn’t. You can do pretty much anything you can imagine to excess.

      • PrivateNoob
        link
        fedilink
        382 years ago

        The no fap community is definitely overexxagarating the pros of not masturbating, but in it’s core they are supporting a healthy cause. Never been an r/nofap guys but they definitely helped me a bit to stop my porn addiction.

        • @Bluefruit@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          172 years ago

          I’m glad you mentioned reasonable levels because like with anything, it can be harmful if done too often.

              • @evidences@lemmy.world
                link
                fedilink
                32 years ago

                I had a friend recently who was on flomax, which is a prostate drug but they were treating his kidney stone, he said when he finished it came out like a puff of dust. I’ll let him know he should have stopped.

            • @Bluefruit@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              182 years ago

              Great question.

              Essentially if its not interfering with your life in a meaningful way, you’re fine.

              If it causes you to miss work or if you’re unable to wait until you get home and end up doing it somewhere its not acceptable, then its an issue.

              Or not being able to stop or reduce the frequency can also mean its an issue.

              However, rather than listen to some nobody in the internet, you’d want to consult a medical professional.

              • @psycho_driver@lemmy.world
                link
                fedilink
                22 years ago

                If it causes you to miss work or if you’re unable to wait until you get home and end up doing it somewhere its not acceptable, then its an issue.

                I remember a story about some low level politician pulling off into the parking lot of a preschool to rub one out. That probably would be a good example of this.

            • @ricecake@sh.itjust.works
              link
              fedilink
              22 years ago

              Are you numb, bleeding, sore or neglecting other activities like friends, family or your job?

              You’re probably fine. Whole area’s kinda built to do that pretty regularly. So same rules as exercise.

          • @SnipingNinja@slrpnk.net
            link
            fedilink
            22 years ago

            Is there an actual specific reasonable interval or does it vary person to person (of course putting aside any specific issues like muscle injury in the area for an example)

            • @Bluefruit@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              32 years ago

              It does vary from person to person. Whats reasonable for you may not be reasonable for others. Libido as well as age is gonna be a factor. Some people do it multiple times a day and others are a couple times a week.

              Again as long as its not hurting you or others, go for it man. Like others in this thread mentioned, in moderation, its a healthy thing to do.

        • @lyam23@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          -1
          edit-2
          2 years ago

          I’m not taking a side, but unless there’s some new evidence, virtually every study I’ve seen is filled with little to no evidence this is true and sums up with something to the effect of ‘results uncertain, more research needed’.

  • @June@lemm.ee
    link
    fedilink
    612 years ago

    If it just takes a month to break, it’s not an addiction. It’s a habit.

    Really hate the way that the word addiction is watered down by people who just look at porn a lot.

    • DigitalDilemma
      link
      fedilink
      112 years ago

      I’d like to agree with you, but I don’t think there are fixed periods where stopping something turns it from being addiction into habit.

      Addiction is an inability to stop using a substance or engaging in a behavior even though it may cause psychological or physical harm.

      I think porn can come within that definition, just as much as smoking or drinking can be called a habit.

      • @June@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        72 years ago

        And I’m saying that what’s described in the OP is a habit, not an addiction.

        ‘Addiction’ is very overused when it comes to porn because people don’t have any concept of what addiction actually is. Half the time the harm doesn’t come from looking at porn, it comes from the purity culture that we’re inundated with in western society. Being abused by puritanical ideology does not make looking at porn an addiction. Neither does having a strong sex drive that makes us want to engage with sexual content.

        • @CheeseBread@lemmy.ml
          link
          fedilink
          32 years ago

          Porn addiction is real, and watching porn can have more harm than just puritanical bullshit. Most people that I’ve watched looking at porn don’t just find a video a watch it start to finish. They watch multiple videos, fast forwarding to their favorite parts. Delayed gratification is good for you. Also, porn doesn’t accurately depict what sex is like. It can give you fucked up expectations of what sex should be.

          If you watch so much porn that you can’t have an orgasm without watching it, if you are only aroused by porn that can’t exist in real life, if you stop having sex with a partner to instead only masturbate to porn, if you find yourself constantly watching porn even at inappropriate times, if the amount of porn you watch decreases your quality of life… That’s addiction.

          I think that masturbating is healthy and good for human sexuality, but I think a lot of people could benefit from masturbating differently. Try reading or using your imagination or even just masturbating meditatively, focusing on sensations.

          • @June@lemm.ee
            link
            fedilink
            12 years ago

            Never said porn addiction isn’t real. I’m saying it’s less common than people think and that most people who say they’re addicted to porn aren’t.

      • @June@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        -12 years ago

        And I’m saying that what’s described in the OP is a habit, not an addiction.

        ‘Addiction’ is very overused when it comes to porn because people don’t have any concept of what addiction actually is. Half the time the harm doesn’t come from looking at porn, it comes from the purity culture that we’re inundated with in western society. Being abused by puritanical ideology does not make looking at porn an addiction. Neither does having a strong sex drive that makes us want to engage with sexual content.

    • @ricecake@sh.itjust.works
      link
      fedilink
      12 years ago

      Didn’t take me more than a month to quit smoking, is that just a habit rather than a real addiction in your eyes?

      You’re going to have a tough time arguing that compulsive behavior that the individual has difficulty stopping and often performs when they otherwise didn’t intend to isn’t addiction, just because they found a way to stop.

      • @June@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        12 years ago

        Again, I’m not saying porn addiction doesn’t exist.

        I’m saying that the use of ‘addiction’ with porn is extremely overused and most people who claim to be addicted aren’t.

        And for what it’s worth, I quit smoking after three years of up to 2 packs a day in a single day. Just made the decision and never craved them again. Every body handles substance dependencies differently. But porn addiction is different and the comparison is apples and oranges.

  • Constant Pain
    link
    fedilink
    192 years ago

    I don’t masturbate because I’m horny. I masturbate because I’m bored.

  • @Skkorm@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    52 years ago

    Porn addiction isn’t a thing. People with addictive personalities always out here trying to blame whatever they are hyperfocusing on, instead of getting some therapy and addressing their neurodivergency.

    • @Kafkacious@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      32 years ago

      This is a refreshing comment thread compared to reddit these days. You just get shouted at saying something like this. There are chemically addictive things and then there are things that are addictive and habit forming because they are fun. Totally separate things. One takes self control, one takes outside help.

      Accurrate comic though minus the being able to go over a week part!

      • @Ookami38@sh.itjust.works
        link
        fedilink
        32 years ago

        The problem is, that line of thought isn’t very useful conditioning is a thing very much so, and you can absolutely be addicted to the dopamine release. Just because it’s downstream doesn’t mean the porn isn’t the ultimate addictor.

        You can also self control your way out of addictive substances like nicotine. Only a scant few need medical intervention. Unless you’re going to tell me heroin and alcohol are the only actually addictive substances that exiat. It’s INCREDIBLY reductive to reduce anything that doesn’t have a specific chemical addiction mechanism to “not an addiction get help lol”. Yes, get help. Probably from these things called addiction therapists, that deal with things like porn addiction and gambling addiction.

  • @HelixDab2@lemm.ee
    link
    fedilink
    -52 years ago

    Porn addiction isn’t a thing. It’s made-up bullshit by people that buy into Judeo-Christian morality regarding sexual “purity”. There are reasons that it didn’t make it into DSM-V, and won’t make it into DSM-VI either. The porn and masturbation isn’t the problem, it’s how people feel about it, and how they reconcile it with their own beliefs in morality, which is not even remotely the same as being addicted to opiates or nicotine.

    • @Sodis@feddit.de
      link
      fedilink
      192 years ago

      The masturbation definitely is not the problem, the porn might be. It just gives a wrong picture of intimacy and sex to inexperienced teenagers.

      • DigitalDilemma
        link
        fedilink
        92 years ago

        And some frankly bonkers ideas about what real sex is like.

        But when I think about my youth in pre-internet days, when you relied on a trucker flinging his jazz mag into the bushes and being lucky enough to find it before the slugs, I’m not sure learning about real sex was any easier then.

    • @pixeltree@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      92 years ago

      Even if you don’t call it an addiction, I still consume an unhealthy amount of porn imo. I worry that I wouldn’t be able to get it up for a real person, not that it matters cause I’m too mentally screwed up to try hooking up or dating.

      • @Kage520@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        72 years ago

        Start slow by starting to masturbate before turning on porn, remembering the last porn you watched. Slowly increase the amount of time before turning on porn. Then over time eventually you might be able to get off entirely by remembering what you’ve seen before. You can use that skill any time when with someone.

      • @HelixDab2@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        -32 years ago

        You think you consume an unhealthy amount of pornography, because that’s the message that you’re hearing from religiously-motivated sources. (Groups like “Fight The New Drug” are funded and staffed by Mormons, which meets all the criteria for a high-demand religion, AKA cult.) It’s the way that you conceptualize your use of pornography, rather than your consumption of pornography, that is the problem. When you compare self-described “porn addicts” to average people that do not label themselves as addicts, their consumption is most typically either identical, or slightly below average.

        Your anxieties about “[not] be[ing] able to get it up for a real person” are what is likely to cause problems because that’s going to interfere with your arousal levels.

        • @pixeltree@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          42 years ago

          Bruh I haven’t been brainwashed by religious messaging, I have an archive of like 20 gbs of super niche fetish shit because I’ve essentially over the past decade shifted what I consider normal way into the deep end. I’m not saying that porn addiction is a thing, just saying that overconsumption can still be a problem.

        • @Ookami38@sh.itjust.works
          link
          fedilink
          02 years ago

          Surprisingly, porn use has damages outside of just puritanical BS taboo! Instant gratification, a decrease in drive to meet your needs in other ways, unhealthy associations with sex (because that actually exists outside of puritanical views, believe it or not), some pretty gnarly effects around the whole dopamine release and reward seeking thing…

        • @Kornblumenratte@feddit.de
          link
          fedilink
          52 years ago

          You mean, you haven’t met someone with a mental addiction yet.

          But — you are technically correct, indeed.

          In ICD 10 the disorders that are commonly regarded as mental addictions are classified not as addiction, but as eating disorders, habit and impulse disorders and disorders of sexual preference. Don’t know whether I missed any.

          BTW, Substance-related addiction is classified as mental and behaviour disorder due to psychoactive use. So, technically, “addiction” does not exist at all.

          • @HelixDab2@lemm.ee
            link
            fedilink
            02 years ago

            I’ve met people with behavioural disorders, sure, but not “mental addictions”, since an addiction requires a physical component.

            I think you can broadly say that a genuine addiction starts because it’s pleasant, and then continues because stopping causes you to actively feel bad. E.g., you keep smoking because the withdrawal from nicotine is pretty shitty, and takes a week or so to get past (although the behavioural component to the addiction can take weeks or months). Masturbation and porn use doesn’t fall into that model at all; the consequences of not masturbating is that you don’t feel something pleasant, not that things start hurting.

            It’s simply not in the same category as alcoholism, or addiction to nicotine, opiates, etc. People that call it that do so for for moral reasons, not because it’s a legitimate medical issue. If you speak to a psychologist that is trained in and specializes in sexual disorders–again, not one that’s using a religious/spiritual approach, but one that’s evidence-based–you are unlikely to find anyone that regards it as a legitimate disorder unless you’re doing things like masturbating at your desk at work 3-4 times/day, or needing to pull your car over on the way to work to compulsively masturbate.

            • @Kornblumenratte@feddit.de
              link
              fedilink
              12 years ago

              an addiction requires a physical component.

              If this is your definition of addiction, a “mental addiction” cannot exist. I am happy to concede I am wrong and improve my knowledge if you would be so kind to point me to sources prooving this is the general accepted definition of the word.

              Masturbation and porn use doesn’t fall into that model at all; the consequences of not masturbating is that you don’t feel something pleasant, not that things start hurting.

              Well – no. Not for all people. While “blue balls” are a myth, bad mood, emotional instability and even aching genitals are at least for some people consequences of sex withdrawal. Craving does exist as well.

              It’s simply not in the same category as alcoholism, or addiction to nicotine, opiates, etc.

              That’s true.

              If you speak to a psychologist that is trained in and specializes in sexual disorders–again, not one that’s using a religious/spiritual approach, but one that’s evidence-based–you are unlikely to find anyone that regards it as a legitimate disorder

              Well — actually I haven’t met any psychotherapist who doubts that there are people with non-substance related addictions. I have no experience with sexual addiction myself – only met a couple of patients who claimed to have overcome it – but I did work with patients with eating disorders, which we viewed and treated as addiction, and with pathological gambling, which is viewed as an addiction as well.

              Ok – so far to the existence of “mental addiction”.

              Regarding “porn addiction”, I agree, that a habit has to meet the criteria for addiction. So I agree someone isn’t addicted to masturbation/porn

              unless you’re doing things like masturbating at your desk at work 3-4 times/day, or needing to pull your car over on the way to work to compulsively masturbate.

            • spez
              link
              fedilink
              English
              12 years ago

              Lol. This is a real thing. I suffered from this. Labelling this ‘Christian’ doesn’t make them false.

              • @HelixDab2@lemm.ee
                link
                fedilink
                -22 years ago

                No, you didn’t. You believed you did, because Judeo-Christian fundamentalists convinced you that you did, in order to sell you their cure. You’re actively promoting their talking points, as well as the talking points of the alt-right.

                How many people can you find that are licensed clinical psychologists, that are trained and specialize in sexual disorders, that use an evidence-based approach to treatment–not a spiritual-based or spiritually-aware approach–that promote the idea that there is “porn addiction”?

                • @spookedbyroaches@lemm.ee
                  link
                  fedilink
                  02 years ago

                  You can just ask why the person labeled it as an addiction. What if he was regularly missing work, social gatherings, or other things due to his urge to masturbate? Is that not an addiction? If a person’s life is worse because they can’t stop doing something that’s an addiction.