I once tried to grab my glasses to keep them in place while I leaned forward or something. Except I was wearing contact lenses at the time, so I just poked myself in the eye. It wasn’t a serious injury, but I felt really betrayed by my own brain.
Haha, isn’t that the beat feeling. Especially if you’re exercising. Happens too often.
I wrench on cars and there have been moments when I was trying to break a bolt loose and thought to myself “If this thing comes loose right now, I’ll probably smash my knuckles against [object]… Nah, I have it under control.”
I have, without fail, always hurt myself right after having this thought. I just don’t seem to learn.
I’ve done this! Except it was the handle of a pry bar hitting my face.
One time the surface I smashed my knuckles into was … my face! Double ouch.
When I was a kid, I was playing with some friends who had managed to get a big plank of wood up into a tree, balanced on just two branches.
I climbed up onto it and walked out onto the board between the two branches and it predictably collapsed. I fell, landed on my feet, and the board landed in front of me completely vertically. My nose went down onto it completely and hit hard.
Had a nosebleed for several hours. Was not a good time, but I can look back and laugh now.
Microwaved a boiled egg to reheat it. Didn’t know microwaved boiled eggs could explode. Bit into boiled egg and it exploded in my face. Ended up with a scratch in one of my eyeballs.
For those who have never scratched their cornea I should add that it is the of the most painful injuries.
I was literally rolled in a ball wanting to die when it happened to me. I went to hospital to get it looked at (ha, eye pun!) and when the doc put some eye drops in to numb it I practically gibbered my gratitude.
Turns out you have to let it heal by itself and the eye drops works be wearing of in an hour or so. 3 days off work so I could lie on a sofa with my eyes closed. Fun times.
Jesus fucking christ. Have to read up on what not to microwave.
Wanted to cook for my mother when I was a young child. Grabbed a chair, climbed on, stuck on the hob, waiting a minute and checked to see if it was hot by putting my hands on it 🤦♂️
I was finishing a tile backsplash. The last thing is using a sponge the size of a brick that has water in in it to wipe off the grout glaze .
I had recently put nice copper knobs on the cabinets.
The wires from the wall outlets were pulled out, and being an idiot I didn’t flip off the circuit breaker.
So I leaaned with the wet sponge and hit the wires with the sponge just as my head hit one of the copper knobs.
It felt like Zeus sent a lightning bolt up my ass and up out through my head.
Im a more cautious person now.
Running in the bush, I put my foot straight in a wombat hole. A wombat hole is about 2 feet across so I ended up feet first, chest deep in the hole. My bug toe landed first and shattered in 7 pieces. Sprained my ankle on the other foot too so it was a super fun walk home!
oof, that sucks… better than an echidna hole though, I guess!
11, had just learned to ski, and so had my 8 year old brother. Except he hadn’t really learned to brake yet so just went full speed downhill. As a good older brother I thought I should teach him and skid up next to him, reminding him to put his skiis in a V shape to brake. Unfortunately I was too close to him and our skiis got entangled, resulting in us traveling for a good 10-20 meters as a violent ball of skiis and limbs going whichever direction.
My kid brother was luckily fine, but I twisted my thumb bad enough to puke, freaking out the rest of the kids we were with. Didnt get to skii much more that trip.
Yesterday
Got high, used hammer, broke finger.
Young car enthusiast me had gotten a new car, my first with disc brakes. I was admiring those brakes after a drive, and decided to touch them.
Turns out, brake discs get hot.
Coincidentally just punched myself in the face by accident… I’m on a crowded train replacement bus and my hand slipped while pulling up my backpack…
As a young teen, I microwaved Kraft singles in an air tight magic bullet container trying to make nacho cheese (I was inspired by the infomercial). Lid got stuck, so I had to use a lot of force to get it loose. Molten cheese exploded all over the kitchen and on my left arm. I had second degree burns and a scar for a few years.
Teacher, jumped in to play some football with the kids. Played for about 5 minutes before spraining my ankle badly and fracturing a bone in my foot.
2 years later it’s not good.
All I wanted was to have some fun for a couple of minutes.
Cutting a loaf of banana bread, 6yo me decided to use a paring knife. When it wasn’t cutting well, I used my index finger for more leverage. It wasn’t cutting well because the blade side was up. Sliced my finger up pretty good.
I was reaching above the stove and put my hand on a red burner. For a month I had cool circle scars.
