Yep, I was like ‘so what?’ Ooohhhhhhh….

I was in a cruise once and went for a run around the ship. I forgot how things work and started the activity in my watch. The stats using GPS were wild.

When I was in college, in network class, the teacher was talking about level of service, package reordering and the challenges of streaming videos through a network. Internet was starting and we were still using 14400 modems (which, by the way, was already considered fast). Throughout that class I was thinking why the hell I was studying that king of problems with our speeds.

TIL Portugal uses CARALHO the same way as Brazil.

I’m the king of obliviousness. She passed her hand over my dick. Twice.

I also see the silhouette of a ghost.

If you’re interested in cruising (with ships, not the other kind), there’s cruisemapper.com.

This is exactly how I see those celebrity magazines.

Everybody knows that, if it’s your birthday cake, it doesn’t have calories.

This looks like a Norwegian/Swedish keyboard. What’s infuriating about it?

There’s an old myth about a shipment of playing cards. The guy buys a whole container of playing cards, but removes the same card from all packs. The shipment is confiscated and later sold for almost nothing because the packs are all incomplete. He then buys the shipment and restores the packs. All this was cheaper than paying import duties.

Maybe this guy is playing a long game.

That’s Russ!

2, sometimes 5, rarely 20. My wife 2, maybe 15.

If I can’t have booty, you can’t have porn.

Wait, what?

Hummm that’s exactly the opposite of what you should do. Of course, if it’s a Tinder date, go ahead. But if you’re looking for a girlfriend, going a (first) date with a loaded gun is not a good idea. Blow a load right before, so you’re more romantic and will think straight.

But… that’s not the right way. Are you saying the ISO8601 violates ISO8601?

• so, apparently not I just whooshed, I didn’t even noticed the dates are ambiguous.

There’s a shoe store near me. It stands alone in an almost non walkable part of a street. I never see a car in the parking lot. It’s always open and it has been there for, like, 15 years or more. It’s impossible that that store is profitable.

They’re trying to catch police officers who smoke weed. That’s why they’re doing it in front of a police station.

Already voted. Civic duty done.