Did Tina Belcher write this?

The M on his head stands for “Murder.”

Personally, I’m glad my wife has a body. Being married to a discorporal phantasm or a living severed head would be difficult.

I would cross oceans of time for free chips & salsa.

“A bird in the hand gathers no moss.”

“You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t take it with you.”

Big Macs are gross though.

https://www.motherjones.com/politics/2026/01/ice-descends-on-minneapolis/

Rug Doctors are great. I used to rent one twice a year to scrub my carpets. Now I’ve removed my carpets so no more need.

This reminds me of that Reddit sub “r/totallynotrobots”

Will someone please do to him what he did to Maduro?!

The games are prohibitively expensive.

Even if you calculate hours-of-entertainment-per-dollar-spent, it’s crazy expensive.

I always close the lid when I’m not using my toilet. So do my wife and kid. It’s weird that people leave theirs open.

💿💿🥜🌰

I said usually. And all of those complaints were overblown or taken way out of context. Like the cable thing? A cheap-ass charging cable from China catches an iPhone on fire, the headlines would read “iPhone catches on fire.” Any hardware manufacturer would be wise to block unlicensed chargers like that. But consider their hardware releases…

Smartphones prior to the iPhone sucked.

MP3 players prior to the iPod sucked.

Tablets prior to the iPad sucked.

Smart watches prior to the Apple Watch sucked.

Apple usually prefers to do it right rather than do it first.

Interstate Fuck Song -STP

Fraud?

Wouldn’t that be more effective if it was white milk + powdered milk? Otherwise isn’t he just making his 2% or whatever a slightly higher %?

I think it would still be weird. But then I have a photo of my kid smiling in front of the limo JFK died in (at the Henry Ford museum), so maybe I’m wrong.