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@cm0002@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world • 1 month ago

Clean butt

lemmy.ml

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Clean butt

lemmy.ml

@cm0002@lemmy.world to Lemmy Shitpost@lemmy.world • 1 month ago
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  • @agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works
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    27•1 month ago

    • @besmtt@lemmy.world
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      8•1 month ago

      🤌

    • @smol_beans@lemmy.world
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      3•1 month ago

      If I got shit on my arm I would wash it with soap, there’s no soap in a bidet so I don’t get this argument

      • @agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works
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        6•1 month ago

        Water > dry paper.

        • @smol_beans@lemmy.world
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          1 month ago

          That’s true but if the argument is “deal with shit on your butt the same way you would deal with shit anywhere else on the body” then the logical conclusion would be to take a shower after every poo

          • @agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works
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            1 month ago

            The argument is “The common way of dealing with it is bad”. Doesn’t have to be perfect to be better.

      • @suodrazah@lemmy.world
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        2•1 month ago

        By that logic, why wash it off at all? Why do anything?

      • @xx3rawr@sh.itjust.works
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        2•1 month ago

        But with a bidet, you do have an option with soap since it can be rinsed (which I believe is the norm in my poor ass country, be it bidet or good ol’ dipper). I don’t normally wipe soap with a tissue.

    • @Korhaka@sopuli.xyz
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      3•1 month ago

      I don’t know about you but I don’t wipe my anus on my face or use it to pick up food. No judgement though.

      • @agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works
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        6•1 month ago

        Me either, but I would still prefer it to be clean.

      • @some_dude@lemm.ee
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        1•1 month ago

        Do you ever have someone’s face near your junk?

  • @WoodScientist@sh.itjust.works
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    22•1 month ago

    Why is my ass always itching?

    Because you don’t wash it, you dumbass.

    • @MisterFrog@lemmy.world
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      1•1 month ago

      Do people not wash daily? This seems like a general hygiene issue, and not that closely correlated with bidet use.

      Source: I have never used a bidet, and my butt does not itch, ya know, because I wash daily?

  • @Doctor_Satan@lemm.ee
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    20•1 month ago

    “Hey, if some caked-up mud pie got on your face, would you just wipe it off with a dry piece of tissue and call it a day? No! You’d wash it. So why is your butthole any different?” - Detective Allen Gamble, ‘The Other Guys’

  • 😈MedicPig🐷BabySaver😈
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    16•1 month ago

    I got onboard the bidet train during the Covid lockdown. Simple to add on at my apartment. It was my #1 request when I moved to my GF’s house. We replaced the whole toilet with the upgrades.

    • GladiusB
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      5•1 month ago

      Yup. Same. Feels way better. It’s just like taking a shower after every dump.

      • 😈MedicPig🐷BabySaver😈
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        4•1 month ago

        Yay, bidet!

  • @60d@lemmy.ca
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    13•1 month ago

    An actual shit post lol

  • @7toed@midwest.social
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    10•1 month ago

    Reading this on a toilet without a bidet :(

    Please send your prayers

    • @TheRealLinga@sh.itjust.works
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      9•1 month ago

      Thought and prayers 🙏

  • @Elkot@lemmy.world
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    9•1 month ago

    Had my first experience of a bidet in Japan but not just that, the toilet seat was heated too, that was my first dump after landing

    • @bluewing@lemm.ee
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      2•1 month ago

      That’s what I love about mine. Automatic lid raise and lower as you walk in, heated ring and water, (both adjustable temp), air dry, (again heated), and charcoal filtered air filtration to minimize the stench from that drive through burrito.

      It’s the posh life. Very nearly the equal to having your own chamberlain.

      • @leftover@lemm.ee
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        2•1 month ago

        Humm, I see you enjoy Toto. The king of home Bidets!

        • @ikidd@lemmy.world
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          1•1 month ago

          God bless the rains down in Africa.

  • @frezik@midwest.social
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    1 month ago

    I like the bidet’s we have at home, but I don’t get the ones that are separate from the toilet. Saw this type when visiting San Juan, PR once. Their plumbing system can’t handle toilet paper very well, so it’s all bidets with a stack of washed towels.

    Not only do they take up extra space in the bathroom, but are you supposed to waddle over to this thing with a dingleberry hanging out? I don’t get why you’d want that.

    The one argument I’ve heard in their favor is from people with vaginas who don’t like the idea of the built-in sprayer catching bits of poop that’ll get in their cootch.

    • @Scrollone@feddit.it
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      -18•1 month ago

      deleted by creator

      • @some_dude@lemm.ee
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        9•1 month ago

        A world with people? With vaginas?

      • @ArtemisimetrA@lemm.ee
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        8•1 month ago

        Not all vagina-havers are women is the point you seem to be missing.

        • @Scrollone@feddit.it
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          -9•1 month ago

          deleted by creator

          • @nickiwest@lemmy.world
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            8•1 month ago

            Do you also think that saying “Happy Holidays” somehow excludes Christians?

            Increasing the size of your umbrella doesn’t discriminate against the people who are already under it. It simply invites more people to join them.

          • @funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works
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            2•1 month ago

            bad opinion

          • @null@slrpnk.net
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            1•1 month ago

            Delete this too.

          • @veeloth@lemm.ee
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            1 month ago

            how tf does it discriminate women?? it’s calling all vagina havers women that’s discriminating towards non women, this is just being inclusive

      • @null@slrpnk.net
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        6•1 month ago

        What are you talking about?

        • @Scrollone@feddit.it
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          -9•1 month ago

          deleted by creator

          • @null@slrpnk.net
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            7•1 month ago

            Why do you assume it’s fear that motivates people to use language that’s inclusive of trans and non-binary people?

          • @zedigalis@lemmy.ca
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            4•1 month ago

            It’s not fear it’s just taking a bit of effort to be respectful and inclusive.

            If someone gets mad because you just said women then yeah I’d agree that’s a bit much but taking a bit of time to be inclusive shouldn’t be something you’re upset about.

          • @null@slrpnk.net
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            1 month ago

            Still waiting for an answer, big guy.

            Just kidding, we know it’s because you’re scared of queer people.

            • @Scrollone@feddit.it
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              -1•1 month ago

              deleted by creator

              • @null@slrpnk.net
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                -1•1 month ago

                Then answer the question.

          • @null@slrpnk.net
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            0•1 month ago

            No, that’s deleting your comment like a coward.

            I asked you to answer the question, transphobe.

  • @B4kst33n@lemmy.world
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    7•1 month ago

    So, maybe I’m missing something here, but bidets don’t seem all that great? Everyone on the internet is always proclaiming life changing experiences with these things. However, when I recently used them they don’t seem to do very much. My butthole is still poopy and when I wipe to dry my ass the toilet paper tears.

    • @StJohnMcCrae@slrpnk.net
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      12•1 month ago

      Operator error.

      • @Shardikprime@lemmy.world
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        3•1 month ago

        Clearly needs more hydro pressure

    • @swampdownloader@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      8•1 month ago

      Some are better than others in both power and nozzle angle/placement. Sometimes you have to shimmy to get the angle just right if the power is low. It should result in a wipe in which no fecal matter remains, only wetness, if executed properly.

    • @bluewing@lemm.ee
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      5•1 month ago

      You need to use the power washer setting. Takes the paint right off the wall…

    • @LifeInMultipleChoice@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      3•1 month ago

      Low water pressure maybe? Mines a real cheap one and I’ve never had issues with not being clean after. I do usually get stronger toilet paper, but I only use a roll or two a month. I wouldn’t say it’s life changing, but I do prefer it. Also has saved me a lot on tp

      • @Piemanding@sh.itjust.works
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        2•1 month ago

        Yes and also mine takes 30+ seconds to properly clean so make sure you take your time.

  • @MyDogLovesMe@lemmy.world
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    6•1 month ago

    I’ve brought bidets awesomeness in groups before.

    It is immediately apparent who is “in the club” and who is not.

  • @pelespirit@sh.itjust.works
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    5•1 month ago

    My friend has one of those Japanese ones. It also has a warmed toilet seat. When I came out, I said that seat is amazing and they said people never come out of there. I proposed that they were napping on the seat. Why do seat warmers feel so good? The thing is, I could never figure out how to make the actual bidet part work. I suspect the people who took a long time were also trying to test it out, but didn’t know how. Or maybe they did and enjoyed it?

    • @9point6@lemmy.world
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      9•1 month ago

      Japanese toilets are so far beyond what we’re doing anywhere else in the world it’s not even funny

      Wtaf have our toilet scientists been doing for the last century in the western world?

      • @RizzRustbolt@lemmy.world
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        2•1 month ago

        Trying to get people to sit the right way on the toliet.

    • Darren
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      7•
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      1 month ago

      It’s as easy as using two three shells.

      • @Iheartcheese@lemmy.world
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        4•1 month ago

        What’s the third one for

      • @pelespirit@sh.itjust.works
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        3•1 month ago

        I remember it being a meme, but I couldn’t remember which one. For the uninformed like me: https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/three-seashells

      • @get_the_reference_@midwest.social
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        2•1 month ago

        Thanks a lot you shit-brained, fuck-faced, ball breaking, duck fucking pain in the ass.

    • @QuantumSparkles@sh.itjust.works
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      4•1 month ago

      Mom, dad, I’m gay. Also that heated toilet seat is amazing.

  • @Tattorack@lemmy.world
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    5•1 month ago

    Bottle of water. Wash with hand.

  • @benignintervention@lemmy.world
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    4•1 month ago

    Am

    • @cm0002@lemmy.worldOP
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      2•1 month ago

      I am

  • @wanderwisley@lemm.ee
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    3•1 month ago

    Remember you don’t have to clean your whole ass. You just have to clean your ass’s hole.

    • @voodooattack@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      I wash my bum with liquid soap and my ass smells like strawberries all day. Hell yeah bidets

  • @papalonian@lemmy.world
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    3•1 month ago

    I was literally getting my ass sprayed when I opened this meme.

    • @some_dude@lemm.ee
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      1•1 month ago

      Check out this dude/dudette, having sex while on the internet!

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